


Dream

by Elys



Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies), The Hobbit - All Media Types, The Hobbit - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: Action/Adventure, Adoption, Angst, Arguing, Badass, Bathing/Washing, Beorn's House, Blood, Bonding, Contracts, Crying, Cultural Differences, Drowning, Drunk Dancing, Drunk Dwarves, During The Hobbit, Dwarf Courting, Dwarf Culture & Customs, Dwarves, Dwarves Being Assholes, Dwarves Love Gambling, Dwarves Only Love Once, Dwarves and Hair, Elves, Embarrassment, Engagement, Erebor, Eye Contact, F/M, Falling In Love, Fantasy, Fear of Death, Feelings, Fluff, Freeform, Fíli and Kíli Are Little Shits, Fíli and Kíli Brotherly Love, Giant Spiders, Goblin Town, Goblins, Grief/Mourning, Hair Braiding, Hurt/Comfort, Kissing, Love, M/M, Male Friendship, Male-Female Friendship, Menstruation, Mirkwood, Modern Girl in Middle Earth, Mother Hen Dori, Naked Dwarves, Orcs, Overprotective Dwarves, Parent Death, Partying, Possessive Dwarves, Rivendell | Imladris, Romance, Size Difference, Spoilers, Stubborn Dwarves, Tattoos, Thorin Angst, Thorin Broods, Thorin Feels, Thorin Has No Sense Of Direction, Thranduil Not Being An Asshole, Violence, Worried Dwarves
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-04-02
Updated: 2017-11-30
Packaged: 2018-10-13 22:54:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 16
Words: 39,761
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10523616
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Elys/pseuds/Elys
Summary: She turned her eyes to him. Their eyes met and woman drowned in their blueness. They were like the ocean. Deep, dark and mysterious. Beatrice was drowning, but only by looking in his eyes she felt she was breathing. She didn't understand how she could do such a thing: look at Thorin as if he had all the answers to her questions, as if he was air, when she had John?





	1. Portrait

**Author's Note:**

> I'm not native English speaker, so please, bare with my mistakes!

**Change so that nothing will change.**   
**It's easy, impossible, tough going, worth a shot. ***

 

 

She was a variety. She was a chameleon. She was herself. Not everyone could understand it.

She spent childhood as an unassuming and shy girl. It taught her how much importance the words have, how little power have those whose resources of them are limited. Her heart sensitive, her eyes easily watered, her eyelids melting under an excess of liquid. Palms gathered flowers, cheeks turned pink with ease. Polka dots dresses swirled with her every step, caressing her knees. The mouth curved in a delicate half-smile, without grimace, but also without laughter.

Teenage years were full of pride. There was no courtesy anymore, but a rudeness. There was no silence in her mouth but a scream. The louder, the clearer it was, the better. Vulgarisms haunted her vocabulary, her heart hiding under the shade. Her eyes were shining playfully, never filled with tears. Music was higher in the hierarchy than books, flower garlands disappeared from her head. Pale skin, pink lips hidden under scarlet lipstick. Black, loose sweaters and shirts hid tiny waist, and the tight trousers exposed plump thighs. Her steps were heavy, the ankle length boots were ready to make holes in the sidewalk. Smile was always on her face, her teeth always visible in contrast to the wrists.

The high school was a combination of her two life phases. Once in a while, she took off the lens, black appeared less in her dressing room. The hair grew, covered her ears. She smiled less, but sincerity. Her rebellion ceased, she became serious. She understands how important it is to balance the voiceless with the words. She stopped thinking only about herself, engaged herself in getting to know others. Not only did she listen and analyze, she was trying to help. She loved who she was, how she was.

However, true - according to her understanding - cognition came with adult life. She accepted every part of herself, every change that has been made. She did not deal with the panic of finding faults and fixing them immediately, no. She embraced them, became accustomed to living with them. Nobody was perfect, so why would she have to be?

She ran through her bangs with a long fingers. Her complexion was ashen, bags under her eyes visible. Alcohol buzzed in her veins, lips cracked from excessive biting.

She tied the hoodie around her hips and allowed the sun to warm her bare shoulders. She sighed softly as the wind swam into her hair. Despite body aches and drowsiness, she moved quickly, slightly, as if her feet did not touch the ground. She corrected the falling strap of her backpack and was ready to jog to the bus stop. But before she could move on, someone called her name. She turned her head, there was no one behind her on the path. She covered her eyes with her eyelids, a subtle smile crept into her lips.

When light came to her retina again, she was forced to blink several times. Not because of the dazzling glow, but the location in which she found herself. She looked around her surroundings, then twisted around her axis and realized she was in a different place. Drastically different from the previous one and even less known. She absorbed every detail, the panic was replaced by a shock. She came down from the lane, her backpack dangled under the tree, she sat next to it.

Her face hid in her hands, her knees bobbing to her chest, her breathing accelerated. The mind closely followed the events of the moment. She left the her boy's house five minutes later than she should, her step compact, close to running. It was impossible to feel the spilled bitumen in one second, and in the second the freshness of the forest, wasn't it?

It's just a dream, she told herself in her mind, Only a dream. I'm going to wake up and everything will be alright. I'm sure girls, wanting me to relax, added something to alcohol. It's just a dream.

Inhale, exhale, inhale, exhale. The attempt to calm down did not work and before she stop herself, she breathed deeply through her mouth, only to later pull the air in without ejecting it out. The birds were chirping, the leaves rustled on the branches, somewhere in the distance the water was hitting the rocks. She focused on the sounds, displacing carbon dioxide. She managed to calm herself down, her previously lost vision returned, black spots went away. She saw a change in her position. She did not sit back to the trunk, but she was leaning on her hands and knees.

She collapse to her heels and did not move for a long time. It took a few minutes before - with great difficulty - she rose. Legs shook, barely holding her weight. She threw her backpack over her shoulder and repeated the new mantra: Everything is alright, everything is fine, everything is alright.

She had no idea which way she should go, so she chose to ask the fate. She took a coin from her pocket while her thumb felt the pattern. She threw it, grabbed it, then applied it to the outside of her hand. If she draws an obverse, she will go to the left. If it is reverse - to the right. The fingers slowly slid down to reveal the reverse of the coin.

She could not explain in any logical way how she had found herself here, and repeatedly told herself that it was nothing of her imagination. So she went in an unknown direction in unknown area. She did not hear cars, she did not see buildings, she had to be away from civilization. She reached for the phone hidden in her back pocket, hoping she would get out of here. Her boyfriend's smiling face greeted her and the corners of her mouth lifted. But there was no point because, it was out of range. The phone returned to its previous position, and she kept on moving forward without slowing down.

She walked through the forest, until she finally reached the fork of roads. One led to a small village, another in the distance, surrounded by meadows. She could go on, but would it make any sense? She did not have any water or food, and another kilometer to pass would have unnecessarily tired her. The road to the village - according to her calculations - will take her as much as a trip through the forest. She did not want to walk for another hour on foot, so she sat down on the wall, joined to the path line and let her feet rest.

Once again, she reached for the smartphone, but without much effect. She still could not contact anyone. She breathed heavily, the sun was high in the sky, the butterflies fluttering their wings. The world around her was so calm and quiet, unlike Los Angeles. She tied her hair in a ponytail, massaged her calves, and then dropped to the ground. She was about to set off when she heard the whine of the wheels. She turned to look at the carriage, entering her fork. The man in charge of the car was wearing a loose shirt, a blue vest, and brown trousers to his knees. On the trailer that the horse was pulling, she saw the hay, and the boy sitting on it.

"Excuse me!" she called, drawing the attention of the man."Could you take me to the village? Of course, if it's not a problem."

He pulled on the reins, looked at her carefully, and she dared to say that if child would not press, the man would never agree. The child, however, seemed to be strangely awakened by her features and it was not surprising her. Looking at their attire and behavior, she claimed that it was a deep province and someone like her was rare. She entered the vehicle without any help and the boy immediately filled her with questions. He was interested in her clothes, face, eyes. Even the drawings that were covering her skin. Every question she answered briefly and succinctly, trying to be courteous. The father of the child tried not to look at her all. She did not feel good in their company and thanked God that the journey did not last long.

She came off the machine, her eyes stuck on the bare feet of the man and then the boy. She understood the behavior of a younger, though older? Why didn't they have shoes and why their feet were huge and hairy? Though there were questions in her mind that begged for answers, she could not ask. She thanked the man and went on, unsure of what she should do, because people in the village certainly did not own the phones.

She looked around. Well-kept gardens, painted fences, house architecture completely different from what she had seen so far in her life. Two houses from her, the man sat on the right side of the bench. His hair honey-colored, in the right hand he held a pipe, and out of his mouth were flowing through air smoke rings. He looked pleased and with such individuals you can negotiate much easier. It was only after a close examination that she saw a similarity between a man and Martin Freeman. She knew him from Sherlock, but she never felt the need to go into his biography. Does he have a twin brother?

She brushed her hair with her fingers, dust off her trousers and shirt, and then stood in front of him with a shy smile. She cleared her throat and then greeted.

"Good morning! How can I help you?" he seemed to be disgusted with her appearance, but good education did not allow him to insult a lady.

"My question may be oddly, but could you tell me where I am?"

He gave her locations, politely suggested a cup of tea and invited her home when he saw the pale face of a woman. She took off the shoes in the hallway out of habit, the white socks protected her feet from the cold. Man took her to the kitchen. He put a plate of cookies on the table, and settled himself in front of her, waiting for the water to boil.

He saw fatigue on her face, dry lips and bloody eyes. Her attire was quite odd. The loose black shirt hung on her, and the trousers emphasized all her shapes, which made him embarrassed. Another, unknown to him, cloth was tied around her hips. He was horrified by the holes in her trousers on her lap and her demeanor. She did not seem to be dangerous. On the contrary, something told him that this lost sheep was not a threat and would not become a wolf.

"My name is Bilbo Baggins," he said, pouring herbs. "What is your name?"

"Beatrice Whitley," she said.

Hobbiton. Bag End. All these names were so familiar, yet so distant. Probably, if Bilbo Baggins would not say Hobbiton, she would still have no idea where she was. She could not remember much of her high school days, even in the matter of books, although Tolkien's novel she was forced to read. She did not remember much.

There was a hobbit, dwarves, elves – in the Lord of the Rings one of them was played by Orlando Bloom. But she may be wrong. She saw it years ago - and lots of singing. In the end, someone important dies in a battle for something. There is also Dumbledore. In fact its Tolkien version. The dragon also appeared. And she might have liked him.

The thought of coming here was so absurd that Beatrice once again began to convince herself that it was a dream or a hallucination. Not the reality. Bilbo's words merged, the picture vanished, until finally everything became black.

:;:

Beatrice dreamed of home. About her grandma garden full of vegetables. About the trees of her grandfather that gave the fruit. About the swing on which her mom was rocking. About her older sister's bookshelf. About dad's work place. About her room cluttered with cushions, walls covered with photos. About the living room filled with mummy flowers. About the hammock hanging in the middle of the hall for her sister to practice yoga on it. About grandpa's albums with stamps. About grandma's cake. About dad's car.

She touched, felt and tasted everything. Nothing went unnoticed and she was enjoying her memories. Later was John. He patted her on the cheek, drew her lip with his thumb, and his own kissed crown of Beatrice's head. She felt blissful. She wrapped her arms around him and wanted to stay in his embrace forever. His shape suddenly began to melt in her arms, then she could see only a colored blob forming puddle on the floor.

The image of well-known surroundings was blurred in favor of the school building, that she had attended several years ago. The walls were still in a warm, peach orange color, and the smell of sweat and worn boots was still hovering in the air. Still, Beatrice smiled. Particularly, after she saw board with lousy photos of graduates. She touched with fingertips her photo from the times, while she had short, frayed hair. Later, she moved on to the images of her friends and tears blinded her. After the end of high school, they were meeting less and less. They were busy with studying, gaining new acquaintances and their own lives.

Beatrice did not have time to enjoy the vision. The light covered her eyes, making her blind for a few seconds. As her eyelids rose, Beatrice immediately began to soak up the room. Sunlight rained through the open window, aiming perfectly at her face. The mattress on which she was lying was soft, the quilt fluffy, and the pillow gave her cheeks a nice warmth. Her backpack lay in the corner next to the door, the sweatshirt hung on the chair.

She was not sure how the hobbit had moved her to bed and she did not want to know. It was the same with her arrival and stay here. Some things are better unknown, then we do not worry about what has happened and what is still happening. She dropped her bedding to the side, took off the elastic band, and ran her fingers through her hair. She made sure the saliva did not dry in the corner of her mouth or the mascara did not smudge. Everything was fine, so she could leave the room quietly.

The corridor lead to the right and to the left. On the left - towards the exit, to the right - into the hollow. Front doors were wide open. Only after stepping on, she noticed the lack of socks on her feet. She shrugged and then curled toes on the soft carpet. She understood why Mr. Baggins would take off her sneakers, but socks? She laughed, though she did not come back, continued to walk in the direction of the voices coming from the courtyard. She tilted her head from behind the threshold, her eyes halting in the form of two hobbits. Her host and lady, who played with a lacy umbrella.

She did not hear what they were talking about, nor did she see Mr. Baggins's face, but the smile of the woman spoke for itself. She offended Mr. Baggins and took great pleasure in doing so. Beatrice had two options. The first was staying hidden. She could worsen his situation with her presence. She was an unmarried girl in a man's house without a husband or father. Gossip could hurt Mr. Baggins, and she certainly did not want it. The second was as simple as the first. He will go out, she will offend the woman in the most courteous manner, and then - with no regret - will leave with Mr. Baggins.

But before she could decide, the hobbit woman withdrew with grimace. Hobbit turned on his heel and headed for Beatrice. The girl did not return to her room, remained in the hallway and let theirs eyes meet. Mr. Baggins smiled broadly, his pace was faster.

"Good morning, Miss Whitley!" he greeted, and she responded with same politeness. "Please, follow me, I'll made you breakfast, and I'll join you for a meal. It's time for a second breakfast, of course."

Beatrice followed him into the kitchen, allowed herself to sit at the table and waited for the announced before eggs with bacon and tea. Bilbo Baggins did not stop talking, but it did not bother her. Beatrice's mom was the same and she smiled.

"You slept for a long time." he said while slicing bread."All day and night. You must have been very tired, young lady..."

"Beatrice," she said in a hoarse voice. "Please call me Beatrice, Mr. Baggins."

"Of course!" he beamed."Then you have to call me Bilbo, my dear. So where do you come from? I have never seen anyone like you."

Life was full of choices. What to say, what do not say. What to do, what not to do. She could tell him the truth, the whole truth. How she appeared here, with no family to which she could return, how there was no hobbits, elves, dwarfs in her world. She could lied, but how far would it take her? The lie has no legs, and she did not have extensive knowledge of Middle-earth. Only one thing left.

"I come from a faraway place."she began."From the land where I come from, people do not believe in the existence of other races developed intellectually like they do, so there are no hobbits, elves or goblins, there are only humans. Of course there are books that contain information about them... and that's why I did not know where I am..."

Bilbo blinked several times, probably not expecting such a turn of events. He understood from her chatter only that she was not from here. He placed a plate and a cup in front of her and sat down. Belladonna Baggins-Took, his mother, said that if something seems incomprehensible to you, you know not enough, and if you not know enough, you do not judge, you do not make hasty assumptions, even if something seems impossible - trust. Bungo Baggins taught him another lesson, but did it make sense when his heart already chosen? Everything in him told him that Beatrice Whitley is a lost girl with no family.

"Is it the first time you see a hobbit?" She nodded. On another question about not knowing the terrain, she repeated the gesture. "And your family?"

Beatrice swallowed a piece of the egg and then drank hot tea, only now feeling very hungry. She wiped her mouth with a napkin, pushed away the empty plate, and then she put her hands on the cup. Its warmth calmed her.

"I'm alone."she whispered."And I do not know the way back home."

The world around her influenced her. Flavors, fragrances, sounds, touch. She felt it too hard for it to not be true. Mind could not embrace it, but Beatrice knew. She also knew that when she found the entrance, the exit also had to be somewhere.

Bilbo caught her hand in his, a look of compassion on his face. He assured her that she could stay with him as much as she wanted. Beatrice should refuse. She did not have a way to repay him for that kindness. But what would she do alone in a foreign world? No roof over the head, no food and company of the other person? She squeezed his hand and everything was clear.

:;:

Beatrice lived with Bilbo Baggins for a two weeks. Slowly, she became accustomed to a carefree life. She got up with the sun, made breakfast for herself and Bilbo, and then went out to work in the garden. She did not know how to take care of flowers, but she knew her way around vegetables. She left flowers to the Baggins, she herself took care of the carrot farm, the swede, parsley and potatoes. She was not the best, she knew only as much as her grandmother taught her in childhood and what Bilbo told her. She did not want to sit idly and do nothing, she did not want to live in Bilbo's home for free.

After work in the garden, she rested with Bilbo on the bench. He smoked a pipe, she was drinking tea and so they ate the second breakfast. For Bilbo it was the third meal of the day and certainly not the last. Beatrice was busy lunching and later cleaning up the hollow when Bilbo was busy with his garden.

However, the ritual was disturbed on the fifteenth day of her stay at Shire. As usual, she got up early, prepared a meal. She worked in the garden when a thin voice came from behind the fence:

"Don't you think you should invest in a new outfit? This one seems to be worn out and too big for you."

Beatrice raised her head from the ground. Behind the fence was a small girl. She was sitting on the wall, bare feet hanging. She was a very nice hobbit. Cheeks covered with pink blush, and bright curls encircled the round face. Beatrice took off the gloves and hat, rubbed the sweat from her forehead and walked to the stranger.

"I have no money for new clothes." she said shamelessly. "And I'm not going to ask for a new ones from Mr. Baggins. Can I do something else for you?"

The young female looked at her with a long stare, then pulled her hand. Beatrice pressed the wall with her free hand, panic began to flow in her veins. Blonde that stood on the other side frowned, then put two fingers to her mouth and whistled. Next to her appeared three other females, they jumped swiftly through the fence, two of them pressed on Beatrice, the fourth was waiting for the first to say something.

"Ruby, tell Mr. Baggins we are borrowing her for a while. We'll give her back later tonight." she gave order to the girl with short red hair. "Lily, Piper, push harder."

Beatrice leaned bare feet against the wall, puffed and puffed, trying to snatch, but they had a numerical advantage. They dragged her into the burrow five feet away, then pushed her into the bathroom. She did not have time to protest, and parts of her clothes disappeared from her body. She found herself in balls, oil on her skin and hair. Chuckles and whispers echoed. The towel fell on her head. One dried her hair, another body. Beatrice felt at least embarrassed.

"The case is simple, Miss Whitley." said the leader. "We'll make you a beauty and you will repay us."

"I do not think so." she snapped. "I do not know who you are or what you want and do not want to know. Just let me..."

Lily or Piper - Beatrice was not sure - touched her lips with an index finger in a silent gesture. She put her mouth into a thin line, but allowed them to do what they wanted to do with her. She went into one-piece underwear, later in a snow-white shirt and a blue ankle long skirt. The main antagonist pulled the shirt down, revealing a large portion of her breast, while Lily and Piper began to press her in a black corset with straps. Ruby continued to dry the long strands of Beatrice's hair with a towel.

The leader put on her mouth, throat and neckline a little white powder, which - according to Beatrice - fused with her already pale skin. Red dust appeared on her cheeks and eyelids. Whitley feared the effects of this escapade. Dark hair were combed and arranged.

"We're done." the blonde said. "And even if you do not like it, you can not refuse now, you have to repay the debt."

Beatrice did not answer, still unhappy with the abduction. On the other hand, she enjoyed being with girls close to her age. She liked Bilbo, really, but she missed her time with her friends. She missed going out, shopping, parties. Although, she was forced to come here, she was undoubtedly spending time with young girls. The downside of this situation was that she did not know any of them and was not included in their verbal enjoyment.

They led her to the mirror and Beatrice had to admit that it did not work out as bad as she thought it would, because of lack of suitable products. She had cosmetics and she was able to create a work of art with them. She looked at her reflection carefully, focusing on every detail. The corset squeezed her bosom, the skirt emphasized the hips. She swatted her hair to one side, knitting them quickly into the braid and tied with a wet eraser.

"Your hair and body smell of lavender, we put on you powdered pearls, cheeks and eyes are covered with red ocher."said the blonde. She put her hands on her hips, raised her head up. "My name is Mya. It was I who came up with the idea of taking you from Mr. Baggins and changing your miserable life. The robes you wear are a gift from us. As the totem of friendship. We only expect a..."

"New haircut!" they shouted together.

Beatrice stepped back. She looked at the ladies with a uncertain look. Just in case, she made sure all her nine earrings were in place - never know what hobbies can do when they think something is useful - then raised her eyebrows up.

"What do you mean? "she asked. "And what are your names? We did not introduce ourselves."

Three girls whose names she knew but could not fit into the look, grinned and began to chirp. Beatrice kept forgetting about redhead Ruby. First she was ordered to inform Bilbo about her current location, later she was still busy with her hair. Ruby had plump cheeks, big green eyes and dimples under her mouth when she was smiling.

Lily was the one, who had silenced her before. Long, ebony curls fell on her back, her warm brown eyes reminded Beatrice of the deer. She had beautiful, rosy lips. Piper looked like a typical boy, forced to wear dresses. Hair cut shorter than Bilbo's perfectly matched her slender face. Mya was the most beautiful and probably the most sharp of them. Probably that was the reason she was the leader of this small group.

She also introduced herself, although the girls probably knew her well. She and Bilbo were the objects of many rumors, although they did not care too much about them.

"From the time you showed up, we see you in other hairstyles everyday." Lily began.

"That's why we came up with the idea to hire you to arrange our hair." Piper said.

Beatrice sighed heavily. Middle-earth teenagers did not differ from those of her reality. She pointed at the chair. The girls squealed with joy and through some unknown to her way, they set out the first person to hairstyle. Piper sat down on a stool, the back perfectly straight. The girl gave her a free hand in action, so she decided to make a crown. It was the only thing she could do with her short curls.

"It's a special day for you? "she asked, trying to do it as accurately as possible. They did not answer for a long time. She looked up from her braid, looked at her companions, and burst out laughing. Each of them, literally, was red on their faces and neck like a ripened tomato. "Ah, boys." For whom else would the lad want be dressed so fancy?

"Our Thain, Fortinbras, have over a few young hobbits lads."said Mya confidently, despite the blush. "They caught our eye and we thought we could show them around tonight."

Beatrice gave a loud hmm and finished her first haircut. She asked Piper to pick flowers to decorate their braids, and she jumped out of the window immediately into the yard. Another was Ruby. Her feathers were longer than Piper, but still excluded some hairstyles. She decided on a fishtail braid with a tail tucked inside.

"And you have someone you like? "Lily asked, observing the movements of her fingers carefully. "We doubt the truth of the rumors. You and Mr. Baggins do not really match."

Beatrice's features softened, when she remembered John. She returned in her memory to his large hands, broad shoulders and laughing eyes. Her heart was filled with longing. However, she could not get out of here. She could not. Only Bilbo could know, only him she could trust.

"I do," she replied. Maybe she should use past time? "And I miss him very much."

The girls were silent. They did not push the subject, they did not insist on the details. But in her mind Beatrice thanked them. She finished Ruby's hair when Piper returned. She dropped the flowers on the table and sat down next to them.

"When I'm done with Lily and Mya, I'll insert it to yours hair, is that all right?" she told Piper and Ruby. They nodded, agreeing to this arrangement, and Lily took the place of Ruby.

She ran a hand through Lily's strands and set on a french braid. She grabbed her hair so they could be tighten really well and started to work. They were tuck in silence, in tense atmosphere, and Piper sensed it. She leaped nimbly to the floor and walked to Beatrice. She bent her head and studied the drawings on her body.

"Tattoos in the Shire are considered as body desecration. This is not prohibited by law, but this would end up being excluded from society."

"In my land, not everyone accepts it." she admitted. When asked where she came from, she replied, "The name will not tell you anything, my dear Lily."

She patted her shoulders on the sign that she was done. Mya - as opposed to the rest - knew what she wanted. She had a hairstyle that Beatrice had yesterday. She made the dutch braid.

"You have a lot of them," Ruby said."I noticed while bathing. So many colors and shapes! Do they have any symbolism?"

Beatrice thought about it. The first tattoo she made when she was fifteen and a sign of rebellion. Later she made them out of whims. The first tattoo that had real meaning appeared on her when she was eighteen.

"Family, friends, freedom," she murmured. "Some happen, because I wanted to fill the gap among others or under the influence of alcohol."

The group made a palette of ahs and oh oh. They expressed an opinion about the paintings, drinking alcohol by women, ending up with their families. Each of them had a large family, and in the burrows lived many generations. Rarely were they alone, and this day was the only free day for them, because grandparents, uncles, cousins, siblings and parents met at the home of eldest of the family and conferred.

Beatrice did not understand many of their traditions, although she did not mind. The warmth surrounded her everywhere, because of hearing the rumors, seeing how they eat apples, as they give her grapes. She focused on creating. Mom said she would be a great hairdresser like her. Beatrice liked to play with her hair. But it was not what she loved to do. She liked to please Grace Whitley, so she sometimes combed her clients's hair, but that's all. She was simply the type of person, who worked in everything that required manual skills and physical abilities, but everything related to the sciences was disgusting. She needed to resit math, for heaven's sake!

Beatrice was going to cherish this moment. She had to make a living out here and these girls were her chance to do it. She put the last forget-me-no into the golden hair of Mya. With a thumb, she draw a circle on the hobbit's neck. She was tense, probably stressed before meeting her beloved. She stepped back, then looked at them. There was no doubt that they would charm the men they wanted.

Maybe she will be friends with them, maybe she will attend their wedding, maybe she will get to know their children. Nostalgia swept over her. She tried to treat it like a long holiday, she really tried, but she could not. She wanted so much to go home, to mom, to John. To the running water, to civilization, to the technology. Had she been with Bilbo now, she would have cried. Beatrice knew that she would not accept the loss of her previous life for a long time.

She did not know the exact biography of Bilbo Baggins. He could have set out for the journey with the dwarfs, and soon Frodo would appear - at least she thought that was the little hobbit name - and everything would be great. This journey could only be approaching. What then can she do? Just ask Tolkien's Dumbledore for help?

"Ruby do not wear anything white or black. You will look best in the green. Piper, you need to emphasizes your long neck with necklace, do not go in bronze, try with yellow. Lily, the wreath is perfectly composed with a haircut, and the blue will brighten you. Mya, I know you do not need advice, but this one will definitely be useful. Put on a pink or white dress. Thank you for the afternoon and evening."

At the end they hugged each other, said goodbye and wished good luck. They wanted to escort her to Bag End, but Beatrice refused. She needed a moment fr herself, a break from the bustle and for being prepared for Bilbo's verbal attack.

It was dark outside, stars shone in the sky, and the moon lit up her way home. She danced slowly, while walking, humming the melody of a long-not-heard song. She remembered that a man sang it, but she could not remember name of the performer or the lyric. She almost started dancing fully in the center of the path, but she stopped, when person walking toward her come to her view. She only noticed his beard and long hair. He was also much taller than the hobbits in the village.

She opened the door, bare feet enjoying familiar floor. She did grab the door handle and then heard laughter and horrified Bilbo squeal. Immediately she opened the door and went in.

"Bilbo, are you all right?!" she called out to him.

Many pairs of eyes greeted her. Twelve dwarfs, Bilbo and Dumbledore. Beatrice knew everything already. On the morning of the next day, Bilbo Baggins will take a journey there and back again. And she will stay alone in a world where an outsider dies.

**Where's she running, isn't she exhausted.**   
**Not a bit, a little, to death, it doesn't matter. ***

*** Wisława Szymborska "Portrait of a woman"**


	2. Allegro ma non troppo

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There was a hobbit, dwarves, elves – in the Lord of the Rings one of them was played by Orlando Bloom. But she may be wrong. She saw it years ago - and lots of singing. In the end, someone important dies in a battle for something. There is also Dumbledore. In fact its Tolkien version. The dragon also appeared. And she might have liked him.

**I'm trying to court life's favor,**   
**to get into its good graces,**   
**to anticipate its whims.**   
**I'm always the first to bow***

 

Beatrice did not do many things in her life. She did not go with John to ballroom dancing lessons, even though he insisted. She did not read any fantasy book that her friend recommended. She did not love yoga as much as her sister would wish. She did not judge the hairstyles of the women she met like her mother. She was not interested in fashion like her father.

When she was fifteen, she saw on television fighting men. Their movements were smooth, fascinating for teenager's eyes. Kick-boxing was the program's title. Her drawings were not terrible, she had good fingers, her voice was good too, so why - parents asked her - did she not follow their path? Each of them adopted forms full of grace. Father as designer and owner of one of the most famous fashion houses, mother as hair stylist and make-up artist, sister as a yogini. Beatrice chose strength, brutality. But did it mean that she lacked grace?

The girl had a different opinion on the subject. She was beautiful because she became strong. She did not expect her family to ever look at the matter differently. Not only because of their stubbornness, but their temporary or permanent deficit in her life. Confidence in her skills and acceptance of herself made Beatrice behave confidently and now she needed courage like never before.

She did not bend under the long stare of the dwarves and the wizard, she responded with the same gesture. Hobbit walked over to her. He looked pleased with her presence, as if she was able to fix it all. She smiled gently as Bilbo angrily complained in whisper about the unannounced guests. He suffered the most because of the empty pantry and because he could not eat a decent dinner. She opened her mouth to introduce herself, when someone started knocking on the door.

Suddenly, the atmosphere became overwhelming, everyone become serious. Gandalf's words made it even more theatrical. Someone has arrived. If she interpreted the aura well, it was someone important and respected among the dwarves. As she was closest to the entrance she opened the door with a flourish. Beatrice first saw long, black hair that had a few gray bands. The figure in the blue coat turned away, his blue eyes stopped on her. Beatrice did not play in 'guess the facial expressions' game, she did not care about the crowd behind her, she just bluntly asked a question. She asked who he was, and when he ignored her and wanted to went in, she cut him off with her body.

He paused, drew back and looked at her, probably trying to force her to move away. Stubbornly she stood in the passage, waiting for the answer. Her head tilted to the side, her eyebrows high on her forehead. She waited and waited until she finally received an answer.

"Thorin Oakenshield, at your service," he bowed slightly, still keeping eye contact with her.

She should do the same, but her pride prevented her from doing so. She introduced herself with her head raised high. Then she let him in. After closing the door she immediately appeared next to the hobbit, the nature of momma bear stronger than anything else. She folded arms on her chest, carefully observing every move of the newcomer. Thorin started talking to Tolkien Dumbledore - Gandalf - confessing how he get lost two times. He also added something about the sign on the door without which he would never arrived to Baggins' home.

Well, Beatrice thought it would have been better. What's more, she shared her opinion with the audience, though her voice was quiet and only one of the dwarves heard her. He was the highest of them all and the most scary. But it did not bother Beatrice. She send him a mocking smile as he glanced at her.

"So, this is the hobbit?" They heard. Beatrice immediately turned her attention to the Thorin Oakenshield."Tell me, Mr Baggins, have you done much fighting?"

He started circling a hobbit like a predator, categorizing him. Beatrice knew he would not find what he was looking for. Bilbo was not muscled, trained or disciplined. He likes comfort and warmth – that are the qualities that he fits. He was different from the dwarfs not only in growth and lack of stubble. Bilbo Baggins existed as a delicate, tiny hobbit with honey-colored locks and a charming smile. Was it wrong? Beatrice could not say, though she was sure she liked him that way much better. Bilbo made a sound like fight...?

"Axe or sword? What's your weapon of choice?"

Oakenshield was once again close to his kin. He probably felt safer with them, more determined than before entering. The woman sensed a mockery in his voice. Beatrice tensed like a string, ready to defend Bilbo.

"Well, I have some skill at conkers, if you must know. "he answered half-serious half-joking."But I fail to see why that's relevant."

The amusement flashed in Thorin's eyes. The two dwarfs in front of her were not hiding their merriment.

"Thought as much." he said, gently turning his head to one side. "He looks more like a grocer than a burglar."

This time everyone laughed. Gandalf put on a brave face, Bilbo did not understand anything, and Beatrice insisted on being stubborn. In three herds she crossed the route dividing her, and the company leader, outrun him and once again prevented him from walking. His people were behind and in front of her, and yet she did not try to control the anger. She raised her finger to the height of his ribs and pinned him with it to his chest.

"I have no idea who do you think you are, Mr. Thorin, but your behavior is improper." She pointed her finger to the right and left. "You found yourself in someone else's house, a hobbit's house. He is yours friends host, and now yours too. Don't you think he deserves some respect? You came without announcement, you emptied his pantry and you still have the guts to insult him."

Despite the storm inside Beatrice's mind, her face remained stony. She could forgive many things, she could ignore many things, but not this. She won't let them insult her friend in such a cruel way. She stopped Thorin from explaining himself with her hand, then added that everyone was supposed to sit down because it was tea time. The company was not happy.

"Do you have anything else to add? " she snapped. "Only Mister Thorin will get an ale. The rest of you will have a tea and no, you will not get the dessert. What you would get for the dessert will be my and Bilbo's supper."

She went to the kitchen, not paying attention to the awkward silence she had created. There was nothing that she could give Oakenshield. She buried her face in hands, stopping anger. She set the kettle on the stove so the water could boil and at the same time she remembered the soup she had made for dinner. She lifted the lid from the cauldron and after seeing the remains, she hanged it over the fire.

She grabbed the last loaf of bread, sliced it, and then poured tea when the kettle whistled. She poured ale into a mug and started putting everything on the tray.

"Miss..." someone began timidly."Would it be possible to get a cloth to wipe the table? I accidentally spilled the tea..."

Beatrice showed her white teeth in a smile. She loved to inspire mixed feelings, especially the combination of fear and admiration. She doubted the dwarves would be afraid of her, although she hoped that half of them respected her. She gave the hot drink to all of them, the alcohol to Thorin, and then she served him soup.

Then she wiped the liquid from the table, rubbed hair of a blushing redhead and went away to take the rest of the tea to the teapot. She was standing with her back facing them, her adrenaline lowering, and she could only hope that no one would notice her stooping back. She was very tired. Tired with continuing to worry about returning home, living here, meeting the hobbits. Now this expedition, uninvited guests and parting with Bilbo.

Of course, she could stop him. She would use the appropriate arguments, maybe some manipulation and he would stay with her. But what about Erebor and the dwarfs? Who will help them? She was not selfish, at least not to such an extent. They needed him more than she did, though it was difficult to admit it. She understood their nostalgia. They have been nomad for decades, at the mercy of other races. The difference was that she was one, and they were thousands, maybe millions.

And even their relatives did not intend to support them. Thorin Oakenhield found himself in Baggins's burrow much later, because his expedition to Ered Luin. They particularly cared for Dain's and the Iron Hills support. Beatrice had no idea of what geographical points and people were they speaking, but she knew how bitterness sounds. Thorin sounded just like that.

She snatched her braid and arranged it into a bun. She turned on her heels, her bare feet making a specific sound, hitting the floor. She stood nor beside nor behind the Oakenshield, leaning her hip on the arm of the chair. When she felt comfortable, she began to eye the group. With a few she exchanged glances, with some she shared a smile, with others just nod. Gandalf's eyes consumed her with a similar interest she did it with him.

"Bilbo, my dear fellow, let us have a little more light. " Hobbit went on to address it, still living in ignorance. The map appeared on the table. Far out in the east, beyond mountains, rivers, forests and wilderness rises the inaccessible peak.

Bilbo read the name, his face still only expressing confusion. The dwarfs appeared in his house suddenly, nothing made sense, especially why they met and discussed the expedition that did not concern him in his home. Beatrice stuck in the gap between the hobbit and the leader of the company. She bent over the contours of her unknown terrain. Forearms held her weight, the right leg bent in her knee for her own comfort.

Over the Lonely Mountain was drawn dragon, listed several names of the locations and, as she thought, names of the people. The arrow to the east led to the Iron Hills and Dain, about whom she had already heard. The map did not bring much, they still needed another one. And if it was missing, Beatrice hoped it would not be Thorin that lead them.

She slowly rose to her previous position, when her eyes met with the only not bearded individual. He immediately turned red and looked away. She laughed out loud, until her cheeks began to hurt. She calmed down, after only a few minutes, the dwarves were looking at her. Beatrice did not care about they attention, on the contrary. It was even more fun for her.

"If you wanted to look at them closely, you could just ask," she said, pointing to her breast.

She did not feel embarrassed, she did not thought she acted impolitely. They were equals, or at least she thought they were. The low voice sounded from behind her, hissing the dwarf's name.

"There is no need of it, Mister Thorin." She put her hand on his shoulder. "Everyone, regardless of sex, are fascinated by my tattoos."

The man seemed to analyze her words for a moment, then his gaze came down, now he saw the tattoos on Beatrice's skin. Her cleavage was filled with patterns Thorin did not know. He did not manage to move on to other parts of her body, because another coughing sounded, this time it belonged to his kin. He opened his mouth to chastise her for being half naked when she sat down unceremoniously on an arm of his chair. The rest of them seemed not to notice, because they returned to the main issue.

"Oin has read the portents, and the portents say it is time."

Beatrice wished she had watched the film five years ago. After some time the details are blurred, but she had many loopholes in the plot. What did she do in the cinema, instead of enjoying the movie? Did she write with one of her boyfriends? Had she already known John? If she was more attentive, she would remember something that mattered. But how could she know?

"Ravens have been seen flying back to the mountain as it was foretold: When the birds of yore return to Erebor, the reign of the beast will end." said Oin.

Beatrice watched the first movie, but not the second and the third, despite the requests of her friend. Anna showed her the trailer of the Desolation of Smaug, even shoved her Ed Sheeran's song promoting the film. She started humming, and the dwarf in hat told Baggins about the dragon.

"Well, that would be a reference to Smaug the Terrible, chiefest and greatest calamity of our age. Airbourne fire-breather, teeth like razors, claws like meathooks, extremely fond of precious metals… "he explained. He did it with such ease, that she had some difficulties to believe in their bad luck.

Bilbo was a little irritated. Beatrice knew Bilbo's mother from his stories. She was Took, and being Took meant being original. She loved adventures and shared her dreams with her son. Because of her Bilbo knew what the dragon was.

"I'm not afraid!" shouted cute redhead, getting up. Beatrice jumped, almost falling to the floor. "I'm up for it. I'll give him a taste of the Dwarfish iron right up his jacksie!"

He would probably still speak idly if the dwarf beside him did not hushed him. He silenced and pulled him down. Beatrice assumed he was his father. Or brother. Someone from the family. Overprotective dad or brother.

"The task would be difficult enough with an army behind us." spoke dwarf with white beard. "But we number just thirteen, and not thirteen of the best, nor brightest."

Beatrice herself began to wonder how it was possible that they had managed to reclaim the Lonely Mountain. She remembered something about the arrow and the town located on the lake. Pessimist encountered on rebellion. Blonde with braided mustaches hit the table with a clenched hand. Brunette, which was sitting next to blonde, with no beard had similar flares in his eyes.

"We may be few in number, but we're fighters, all of us, to the last dwarf! "

"And you forget! We have a wizard in our company. Gandalf will have killed hundreds of dragons in his time."

Beatrice dared to doubt it. Of course, she did not negate Gandalf's skill, but she was not a positive person when it came to killing dragons. The dwarves cheered, the morale were raised. Gandalf had the same opinion as she. His facial expressions indicated how much he wanted to avoid this situation. He tried to dodge the answer, but the father / brother pressed. How many and how many and how many. The dwarf was not calm, Gandalf was choking on the pipe, and the Durin folk wanted to tear each other to pieces. Some defended the honor of the wizard, others shouted absurd numbers, and some threw ridiculously small. Thorin decided to pacify the situation.

"Shazara!" They immediately sat down. "If we have read these signs, do you not think others will have read them too? Rumors have begun to spread. The dragon Smaug has not been seen for 60 years... Eyes look east to the mountain assessing, wondering, weighing the risk... Perhaps the vast wealth of our people now lies unprotected. Do we sit back while others claim what is rightfully ours? Or do we seize this chance to take back Erebor?! DU BEKAR!"

The people joined in shouting. Their enthusiasm was cooled by the skeptical dwarf.

"You forget. The front gate is sealed. There is no way into the mountain."

Gandalf - again confident of his position - spoke, then took out a key from his pocket. Beatrice turned to the inside of the chair, legs set between Thorin's knees. He have long legs, thought Beatrice. She was a few centimeters smaller than Bilbo, and he was smaller than all dwarfs. Dwarfs, if she was not mistaken, reached the waist of elves and high men. Following this trail, Beatrice was barely over a meter tall. Tears filled her eyes when she realized what that meant.

She was no longer a bombshell with long legs. She wanted to ask how it happen, but the question was stuck in her throat, although she wanted to let it out. The less you question what is happening around you, the more calmer you are. Beatrice took a deep breath and exhaled. Heart returned to previous rhythm. The body relaxed.

The only thing left is to accept the circumstances. Possibly, circling the palace of memories in search of grains that Anna could sow. The girl was obsessed about the Hobbit, especially the brothers. She had no idea which ones, but they definitely died at the end. She did not forget how Anna called her before six am, freshly after the marathon. She was on the phone, groaning that someone was dead and that it was not fair. Beatrice's hearing was drowsy, she tired, although she did not know the world presented by her friend. Now she wished she was listening more carefully.

"M-me? No, no, no, no, no." he denied. "I'm not a burglar; I've never stolen a thing in my life!"

It did not put him in the best light. Not that Beatrice complained. Bilbo Baggins who does not go on a trip there and back again it's a safe Bilbo Baggins. Dwarf with white beard agreed with the hobbit. The intimidating man with a bald head also had something to add.

"Aye. The wild is no place for gentle folk who can neither fight nor fend for themselves."

Just like before, the dwarves exploded. Another argument was made between them. It lasted until finally Gandalf exploded. His face red with anger, the voice loud was lounging around the room. He rose, his head touching the ceiling.

"If I say that Bilbo Baggins is a burglar, then a burglar he is!" he roared. "Hobbits are remarkably light on their feet. In fact, they can pass unseen by most if they choose. And while the dragon is accustomed to the smell of dwarf, the scent of hobbit is all but unknown to him, which gives us a distinct advantage. You asked me to find the fourteenth member of this company, and I have chosen Mr Baggins."

Beatrice leaned back, while Gandalf terrorized the company with his aura. She felt much better without being aware of her height. Her self-confidence came from the familiarity of the martial arts. The rough hand appeared on her much smaller. Heart, instead of calming, beat faster. Out of the corner of her eye she glanced at the Oakenshield, though he did not look at her. The ring on the left hand's finger stung her.

She quickly got up, Bilbo was just getting a piece of paper to sign. Baggins moved away, the contract evolved and was now reaching the floor. Beatrice with her burning cheeks and neckline followed the hobbit.

"Funeral arrangements?" he whispered "Let's see…terms: cash on delivery, up to but not exceeding one fourteenth of total profit, if any. Seems fair. Eh, present company shall not be liable for injuries inflicted by or sustained as a consequence thereof including but not limited to lacerations…evisceration…incineration...?"

"He'll melt the flesh off your bones in the blink of an eye." answered him dwarf in hat. "Think furnace, with wings. Flash of light, searing pain, then poof, you're nothing more than a pile of ash."

Bilbo looked up, said Nope, then fainted. Beatrice rushed toward him and, without waiting for the reaction of others, tried to wake him up. She repeated his name several times, shaking his shoulder. Nothing was fine. She turned around, sensing the presence behind her. The wizard knelt beside her and took the hobbit in his arms. He told her not to worry and promised to talk to her later. Beatrice allowed him to do so and did not reflect on the details of the future conversation.

She took Gandalf's place at the table, trying not to pay attention to looking at her dwarves. She trusted Gandalf and did not worry about the host. Someone beside her cleared her throat. She jumped, when she saw the dwarf she had recently been battling with look.

"Dwalin, son of Fondin, at your service," he nodded, then pointed at the other dwarf." This is my brother."

"Balin, at your service."

Everyone introduced themselves one by one, ending the sentence with at your service. Dwalin, Balin, Bifur, Oin, Fili, Kili, Bombur, Ori, Dori, Nori, Gloin, Bofur, at the end of Thorin Oakenshield. She also gave them her name and asked questions.

Bifur did not speak English. Because of the ax in his head he spoke only in the native language of dwarves, or so told her Bombur. He did not ask her anything, but he supposedly understood what she was talking about and enjoyed her meeting as much as she did meeting him. Beatrice then realized that 'nice to meet you' means a lot in the dwarf culture.

Oin was a little impatient, trying to talk with him was more annoying than funny. A couple of times she had to repeat the answer to his question, his horn pressed against her chin as he leaned toward her. She has never said so many times that her eyes are part of her race, not something to be laughed at.

Fili and Kili were a joyous duo, they weren't seriously, not even for a moment. She willingly shared with them stories about tattoos on her neckline. They did not understand many of them. In the end, they could not know Harry Potter or the Walt Disney. So she gave them the motives from which they were created.

Bombur was a chubby dwarf, a family with Bifur and Bofur. He loved to eat, he could cook and he had a very warm voice. Having heard that her favorite food was pizza, he demanded a recipe and a thorough explanation of how to do it.

Ori was the brave dwarf, who was about to slam the dragon into the butt and the one that spilled the tea. He asked for permission to sketch her and Beatrice did not have the heart to deny him. He took out the notebook and immediately began to draw a line. According to Ori, there was no other woman like her.

Dori, the eldest of the brothers Ri, looked terrified by his brother's enormous interest. The anxiety diminished as Beatrice turned his attention away. First she asked about his well-being, later on about the quality of the dinner, and finally about the tea, which he was still sipping. She hit home. Dori started talking and only Nori could stop him.

Nori had the most funny haircut of them all. His hair was star-shaped, and Beatrice would find it cute if he did not wore a grimace. She could not reach the dwarf. After a few minutes, she stopped trying.

Gloin was the only one of them, who had a wife and child. He showed her their pictures, boasting that his beloved was considered beauty. It was not her type of beauty, but she did not dare comment it. He was also Oin's younger brother.

Bofur wore a hat, though he was not outside. Probably for him it held a sentimental value or he was simply ashamed of his ears. Before he began to talk, Beatrice scolded him for being insensitive Baggins. He laughed and admitted that he might exaggerate a little.

Dwalin and Balin were curious about her origins. She could not explain it exactly, so she told them the same thing she told Bilbo. They did not seem convinced, but did not pushed the subject. It was evident that they were intrigued, apparently the people of Middle-earth did not differ in skin color. The breed had a different meaning for them than for her.

Beatrice was not accustomed to that her being half French half Korean attracted someone attention. It was her accent that fulfilled that role. Over half of her life she spent in France and although she was learning three languages, the French accent was dominant. No matter how hard she tried, she could not get rid of it. They all used English with great ease, even though it was not their native language. She did not have a problem with it, but as soon as she tried to hide her accent it had the opposite effect.

It became more noticeable then, so Beatrice gave up any effort on this issue. And, John loved her accent.

She was sitting at the table, the dwarves spread out. She lift her left hand and started playing with a ring on her ring finger. She swung her wedding ring around her finger, her gaze absent. She did not notice when Bofur approached her. He had a pipe in his hand, cloud of smoke came out of his mouth. He sat next to her and also began to look at jewelery.

"Courting gift? "he asked.

Beatrice jumped up, surprised by his presence. She looked at him with wide eyes, absorbing his figure. She nodded in the confirmation, then hid her left hand under her right. She closed her eyes for a few seconds, then turned to look at the dwarf. He was watching not only her ring or her tattoos, but her as if trying to guess what she was thinking inside her mind.

His gaze was concerned, perhaps even astonished. Beatrice was not sure whether this was the message of her betrothal or something else was a problem. Maybe women like her - full of masculine traits - had no right to marriage. Maybe he was just surprised that she could have a fiance. She opened her mouth to ask when Gandalf called her.

She got up and went to the living room. Bilbo went to prepare guest rooms and she was alone with Gandalf. The fire in the fireplace gave them a nice warmth, illuminated their faces. Beatrice moved her gaze from the flame to the wizard. Like Bofur a while ago, he tried to fit her into some category.

"You're not from here." he said at last.

Beatrice nodded. Gandalf could have been her way out. She would return home, to John, to her world. She would return to the place to which she belonged. So she decided to tell him everything.

"In my world, there are no hobbits, dwarves, wizards, dragons." she began."There are only humans. Nobody believes in your existence, even though you are known to us. Only books about you speak, but there is no proof that you exist."

"How did you get here, my child?"

Beatrice told him about her morning two weeks ago. He listened to her story carefully, and she was trying not to miss anything. They talked in a whisper. Gandalf suggested it for her safety. The fewer people know the details of her story, the better. She get closer to him, wanting to uncover a secret that xuld be put only in his trusted hands.

"I know what will happen, Gandalf," she said. "I do not know the details, but the outline of the situation. I know that they will be able to reclaim the Erebor, but some very important people will die. Bilbo... He..."

She started, but she remembered talking to her friend. She did not understand why Baggins had not given the ring to the wizard, why he had missed the occasion. Anna explained to her then that, if he had done this, Gandalf would have been exposed to too much temptation, and it might have ended badly.

"Yes, Miss Whitley?"

She swallowed and stopped. She had to say something, so she decided it would be a guarantee that Bilbo Baggins would survive the journey, but he would never be the same again. Gandalf knew that the woman was not telling him everything, but he did not press. He only looked at her for a long time, as if through a glance he could get to her soul and read it.

"You will come with us, Miss Whitley," he announced. "There is someone I would like to ask for advice in your case. Maybe we can help you with your problem."

Beatrice beamed at the thought of return to home. A delicate smile touched her lips as she returned to the kitchen to eat something. Bare feet hit the floor, silent humming escaped her lips. She stopped doing everything, when she stumbled across Thorin talking to Balin. Balin sent her a friendly smile, and Thorin stared at her. He checked her from the top to the bottom and Beatrice could swear she had never been so red in her life. There was a smile on Thorin's lips, but when he saw something on her body, he shuddered and turned his head away.

"I'm going with you." she said, but after seeing their confusion, she added. "Gandalf will help me go back home. I will not stay with you long."

She passed them to get into the kitchen. She took a piece of bread and before eating it she heard a chant. She teared a piece and then put it into her mouth, walking toward the dwarfs. She leaned against the door frame and listened to the songs about their lost home.

 

**I tug at life by its leaf hem:**   
**will it stop for me, just once,**   
**momentarily forgetting**   
**to what end it runs and runs? ***

*** Wisława Szymborska Allegro ma non troppo**


	3. 13 beaches

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Beatrice explains fashion to dwarves.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It was very long time from the last update, but I really didn't have any ideas what to write. And when I have written four chapters, I had to translate them and then check it and I really suck at it. lol.
> 
> Sorry for mistakes. I will give you a cookie, if you point them out for me. 
> 
> Enjoy!

**I don't belong in the world, that's what it is  
** **Something separates me from other people**  
 **Everywhere I turn, there's something blocking my escape***

 

 

Beatrice rose up before the sun did.

 

Her eyelids were heavy, her body refused to obey, but she get up from the bed and dressed in the clothes she had come into this world. The evening before she packed everything she needed with the help of Bilbo and Bofur, who offered to do so. He seemed to be one of dwarfs, who were easy going and open. She actually thought of him, when she stood in front of an empty backpack.

 

Bofur counted all necessary items with ease and speed. He had to be well acquainted with frequent travel. Knowing their story, Beatrice knew he was not doing it with pleasure, but with pressure.

 

Bilbo gave her a sleeping bag, blanket and his mother's coat. It was slightly damaged, but it was better than nothing. Hobbit wanted to give her his mother's dress, but Beatrice could not accept it. She knew that while traveling she would not be able to move freely, because it, so she asked for two shirts for change instead.

 

The males left, leaving her alone. Now she could wonder, if she could take everything that was in her bag, when she arrived in the Hobbiton. The phone and the earphones got in immediately. Hand cream and calendar she put down on the shelf. She divided her things for a dozen minutes, until finally there was no object on the bed.

 

On the shelf were: hand cream, calendar, makeup's bag - from which she took several cosmetics to put in a bag - a few pens, a charger for the phone and a pocket mirror. She also got rid of her wallet – it was big, it did not fit – perfume and a sporty blouse. She took out the photos from the wallet and put them in her pants pocket.

 

She shoved her phone, her earphones - she hoped she could listen to some music, look at the photos, feel people, that were important for her- painkillers, several pads and two tampons. Somehow, after a few modifications, she was able to squeeze yet another lip balm, facial cream, antiperspirant - she hoped that, if she would use it every two or three days, she would have enough for the whole trip - and chewing gum. She also put in handkerchiefs and mascara. She would not go anywhere without it.

 

When she was about to lie down, Bilbo came to her again. He stood in front of her with tears in his eyes, saying goodbye. Beatrice hugged him tightly, although she knew he would change his mind tomorrow. Bilbo gave her small purse, which jingled with contact with her hand. Beatrice refused to take his money, but Bilbo insisted that she needed it more than him. The woman sighed and ended up taking it. Beatrice thanked and embraced him again.

 

It was very early, but she knew she had to get up at this hour to prepare a small breakfast for the dwarfs, the wizard, and herself. She took her backpack, so that she no longer needed to come back to her room and went to the kitchen. She dropped the bag in near the entrance, and then freeze. Dwalin, Balin, Dori, Oin and Thorin were sitting at the table. Each had a cup of tea in front of them. They did not seem to be here for a long time, so Beatrice relaxed.

 

"Good morning," she said, but they did not answer. “I apologize to keep you waiting, I will get to breakfast. When I finish, I can wake up the rest.”

 

Beatrice passed them to enter the pantry and they followed her with their eye. She quickly realized why they looked shocked and said nothing to her. It was about her attire. She ignored them and took eggs, bacon, cheese, flour, milk, oil and some fruit. She quickly made a pancake batter. On one pan, she made pancakes, and on the other eggs and bacon. At the same time, she smashed peeled apples and oranges, strawberries and raspberries. When everything was ready, she put it on the table with the plates.

 

The number of dwarfs at the table increased. Only Nori, Fili and Kili were absent. Even Gandalf graced them with his presence. She said she would go wake missing dwarves up, and they still did not react in any way. First, she run into Nori, who was sneaking around, but when Beatrice cleared her throat, he jumped, but looked at her without panic. Beatrice raised her eyebrows and sent him a smile. With a gesture of hand, she invited him to the dining room, then went to the room where the brothers slept.

 

They were still asleep, their snoring spread through the room. The woman laughed and then walked over to them. She touched their shoulders and shook them, calling their names.

 

"Fili, Kili, it's time to get up," her voice was tender. They did not move. “Breakfast is ready.”

 

They immediately got up and began to roll up their sleeping bags. Beatrice returned to the kitchen, chuckling.

 

“Good morning!” she greeted those, who came in during her cooking. The silence fell into the room and the dwarves looked at her. Some were shocked, others were surprised, and the rest seemed amused. Gandalf ignore them and drank his jasmine tea. Beatrice sat at the table, where there was one free spot instead of two. She didn't want to separate the brothers. None of the dwarfs touched anything yet, so she decided to be the first. She grabbed two pancakes and put a bunch of crushed fruits on them. Fili and Kili joined them moments later, laughing at something. “Eat up, please. Eggs taste bad, if they get cold.”

 

Dwarves as if on cue, began to take food from the table. Beatrice had already taken a bite, when she noticed the lack of a very important part of the meal on the table. She dropped the pancake on the plate and ran back to the pantry. Her mouth formed loud: 'oh my fuck'. She came back as fast as she could, grabbed a knife and hurriedly cut the bread, so everyone could take a piece or two. She returned to her chair between Thorin and Dwalin - she wondered why they didn't sit next to each other - and began to eat breakfast.

 

"You wear pants,"said someone. Beatrice raised her head and knew that Kili was talking to her. “With holes. They are skintight. Do you know that those bring more attention to your behind ?

 

“Kili!” Thorin scolded him.

 

Beatrice waved her hand at the man next to her. She chewed cake filled with fruit, then asked.

 

"Holes are wonder to you or how are those trousers sticking to my body? Their cuts are related to the fashion in my country. As for your comment about my ass, thank you. I worked hard to have it look so.”

 

Silence reappeared. Beatrice used that to finish the food, but she could see Ori's mouth open to overwhelm her with questions.

 

“Fashion? So women dressed like this in your culture? And what do you mean by the fact, that you worked hard on- "Ori blushed, but still looked like he wanted to hear the answer.

 

"There are no limits, at least not for me," she shrugged. “I wear dresses, skirts, trousers, blouses, shirts, sweaters. Everything I do like. I trained, Mr. Ori. There is no fat on my body. Well, maybe I was exaggerating, my stomach and legs can have some. All the rest is muscle.”

 

“So you can use weapons? Sword? Ax?” Kili blurted. "Or maybe a bow?!"

 

"Oh no," she laughed. “None of these things. Cold steel is not my thing. But I do enjoy martial arts.”

 

"You won't win a fight with orcs and wargs with your bare hands," Thorin said, then murmured to himself, but she still heard him.“Blasted wizard. A hobbit that fits into an inn and a woman we are to escort, though she is not part of the plan.”

 

Beatrice turned to him, so that she was completely in front of him. She took out her earrings and then grabbed his hand to put them on it. Thorin looked at her puzzled, a blush appeared on his face, several dwarves gasped.

 

"I really don't want to be a problem," she said. She was not angry at him, she understood how important this journey was for him, for them. “So please, accept these earrings as a form of payment. Four of them are made of pure silver, of which two have tiny diamonds in them. Four are made of gold. If that is not enough, I can give you the money I got from Bilbo.”

 

"I could not, Miss Whitley." He slipped the jewelry back into her hand. "I apologize if my words hurt you. We will gladly help lady in need.”

 

Beatrice turned her eyes to him. Their eyes met and the woman drowned in their blueness. They were like the ocean. Deep, dark and mysterious. Beatrice was drowning, but only by looking in his eyes she felt she was breathing. She opened her lips slightly as if to say something, but Gandalf's cough torn her out of trance. She blushed and looked away quickly. She didn't understand how she could do such a thing. How could she look at Thorin as if he had all the answers to her questions, as if he was air, when she had John?

 

“May I?”

 

Thorin pointed at her earrings and then on her ears. The woman nodded. When he was dealing with her earrings, she decided to play with her fingers, so that they would not see how they tremble. She started to braid her hair, carefully not to disturb Thorin. She finished at the same time as him. They didn't move away from each other. The dwarrow's knees were touching her thighs and somehow, it didn't bother her.

 

"You can fight, braid and you wear fine jewelry," Dwalin grinned, while saying this. He patted her on the shoulder. “You are perfect, lass.”

 

"There is no such thing as 'perfect'," she said dryly. "And if there were, I would have been far away from it. Excuse me, I have to refresh myself before our departure.

 

{*}

 

Their adventure began, when the sun pointed to an early morning. They didn't go straight out of the Shire, but to the Green Dragon, where they will buy ponies and provisions. Or so they said. So she asked, who was responsible for the food, though the answer was obvious. Bombur was a cook, he prided himself on this and he told it Beatrice yesterday. She blushed and Bofur chortled.

 

She went to the dwarrow and gave him three quarters of what she had taken from the pantry for herself with Bilbo's consent. Bread, dried meat, blue cheese and some fruits. The rest she left for herself, knowing that she would definitely want to eat, while riding. She would rather not do it. She never ride a pony before, not even a pony. She had no idea how to solve it, and she had to come up with something quickly for Thorin was just going with Bombur to the tavern to buy what was needed.

 

Beatrice politely excused herself, when Bofur was in the process of telling a joke and jogged to the leader of the company. She grabbed him by the sleeve, stopping him from further walking. Bombur did not pay any attention to them and just walked in. Thorin looked at Beatrice's face, then on her hand, holding his wrist now. The woman took a hard breath, trying to get rid of the nervousness that had attacked her.

 

The dwarrow's gaze was very intense. His eyes bore into her, as if he looked into her soul. She cleared her throat, feeling like it refuse to obey her.

 

“Is it necessary for me to ride a pony?" she started, but when he opened his mouth, she added.”This is not the skill I posses. And, I won't stay with you for long. I will be with you only for a moment, so maybe I can walk this distance?”

 

"It's impossible, Miss Whitley," he said, and Beatrice saw how he was trying to be kind. His jaw tightened, and his foreheads creased. “I cannot allow yo to walk. It would slow us down. You will get used to it.”

 

He started walking toward the tavern again, but Beatrice caught him, another idea in her head.

 

"Or I could ride with someone?" she suggested. The dwarrow raised his eyebrows. “I'm small, so maybe weight would not be too much for a pony. Of course, I could switch between company members, so I would not be too long with someone. Naturally, if you and them agree, Mister Thorin.”

 

The dwarrow sighed, closed his eyes, mutter under his breath to calm himself. Finally, he nodded, meaning that he agreed with her plan. Beatrice sent him her best smile, the one that hurt her cheeks, because it was so wide and sincere. They just stood there for a few seconds, though for Beatrice it seemed to be eternity. Thorin looked at her with an unreadable look and her smile dropped.

 

"Do not forget to buy pony for Bilbo," she said to get rid of the awkward silence. “He will certainly find it useful.”

 

Beatrice returned to the group d dvarves and stood with them. She wondered which one of them she should ask for a ride first. The best choice would be Bofur, with whom she had the best contact. His name almost popped out of her mouth, when someone started speaking very close to her ear.

 

“How do you know he's coming? "he asked. Beatrice turned her head and saw Nori.” Halfling. How do you know he will come?

 

Beatrice guessed that the 'halfling' meant 'Bilbo'. She stepped a few steps away from the dwarrow to create a safe distance between them and regain some comfort. The corner of her mouth rose, showing that she knew something he did not and that she wasn't going to share it with him. Nori returned the gesture.

 

“So you want to join the bet? Most of us thinks he won't join, some that he will do it tomorrow and the rest bet he will do it tonight.”

 

"I'm in," she said after a moments of thought. “Around noon, Bilbo will join us.”

 

"I'm betting just like Miss Beatrice," Gandalf said as he stepped onto the horse. He winked and she laughed. "You can ride with me first, Miss Beatrice. We will consider who will take you over later.”

 

She was about to start arguing that no one would 'take' her, because she was not a 'thing', but at the same time Nori picked her up and handed her to the wizard, who had sat her on his knees like a cat. A pout appeared on her face, and those of the dwarves, who saw them, burst out in laughing.

 

The ride was calm. Some talked about the Erebor, joked or exchanged insights on various topics. Beatrice was quiet. She listened to everything, watched unfamiliar terrains, absorbed the world around her. Her oasis f calm ended, when she removed hoodie from her body and tied it low on her hips. She squirmed a little and almost fell, for which she was scolded by her travel companion. The sun was rising higher and it was too hot for Beatrice. It was a very warm April.

 

Ori, seeing her change, speed up to be close to Gandalf's horse. So many questions ran through his mind. Miss Beatrice was so different from what he knew. His mother died few years after his birth, and the dwarf-women were very rare and he have not met one yet. At least not those young, unmarried. He also had no contact with females of Men and Elves. Miss Beatrice did not look like Mister Baggins, nor did she look like a man, elf or even a dwarrow. So what was she?

 

“Can women from your race show so much of naked skin? "he asked, looking at her exposed arms and stomach. The tips of his ears immediately flushed.

 

"It changed with the years," she said, looking down at him. “Centuries ago, the female body had to be covered, her hair also. Although it all depends on culture or religion. I am not limited by any of these, so my attire is considered appropriate. It would be different if I went out on the street in a bikini.”

 

“Bikini?” he repeated uncertain of the new word.

 

She nodded and started speaking louder, seeing that others were also interested.

 

“It's an outfit women use, while swimming or to tan their skin. It leaves little to the imagination, to be honest, because it only covers two parts of the body,” Here she pointed to her breasts and intimate area. Several of the dwarves drew breath in sharply. Beatrice felt the need to explain the fashion of the twenty-first century. "Women put it to show their good looks charm and to attract suitors."

 

It seemed that dwarves understood and for a moment they forgot the issues of nudity. No one asked questions for a few minutes, so Beatrice relaxed. It was a mistake.

 

“And you? Did you wear a bikini?” asked Kili and Beatrice had to look at him from behind the wizard's arm.

 

She stood in the open space between Gandalf's legs, grabbed his shoulders to keep her balance and stared at Kili for a long time. This time, Thorin did not scold him, so Beatrice thought he was curious. It did not surprise her at all. Men everywhere were the same. The woman snorted and leaned her head on Gandalf's shoulder, who probably did not mind the position. He seemed to be amused. Now she was too, when she had a better view of the brothers.

 

“Of course I did,” she admitted easily. “I have four of them. Blue, silver, red and black ones.”

 

“And which one made you have more suitors?”

 

This conversation became increasingly surreal. She was not sure how to respond, because they perceived differently the admirers. She chose the best possible answer.

 

“When I wore red, many wanted to invite me to ... a date. However, when I was wearing black one, my fiance proposed to me.”

 

“You have a fiancée?!" Fili, Kili and Ori exclaimed.

 

Beatrice laughed at their astonishment and she wanted to answer, when the shout came. It was Bilbo running toward them with a paper in his hand. The woman immediately looked at Nori and was content with distraction.

 

“Pay up.” she said.

 

 

 

 

_**And I'd be lying if I kept hiding  
The fact that I can't deal*** _

 

* Lana del Rey - 13 beaches 

 

 


	4. Thunder

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kili wants a song, Balin tells some facts and Beatrice teases Thorin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Uff, it's done. I think I will post one chapter a week, because they are no longer that long as first and second one were. Beatrice is a little teaser, isn't she? :P
> 
> Enjoy!

_**I was uptight, wanna let loose  
I was dreaming of bigger things*** _

 

 

Beatrice had been traveling with Gandalf for a couple of hours, so she could talk freely with Bilbo.

 

Hobbit groaned, dissatisfied with the need to ride the pony instead of walking. Beatrice tried to cheer him up somehow, but then Nori spoke to her, reminding her that she did not want to ride the pony too. Beatrice answered him by sticking her tongue out. The dwarrow laughed. Beatrice was not sure from where her childish behavior came from, but she assumed it was because of Bilbo. He made her feel more cheerful and confident.

 

They talked about the weather, about the fact that Beatrice was definitely too comfortable on Gandalf's lap and many others trifles. When finally came time to change the riding companion, Beatrice chose the closest one, and that meant Nori. She settled down in front of him, at the end of the break, her backpack was already among his things. It was nice to ride with him, but he was a little further away from Bilbo, than she would have liked. Nori wanted to get her into a couple of other bets and get her involved in an affair, that Dori thought was shady and immediately scolded him.

 

They traveled in silence, until Bilbo announced ,that he had not brought a handkerchief with him. Bofur cut a piece of his cloth out of his cloak and threw it at hobbit, roaring with laughter. Beatrice yelled, saying she had some too, to calming him down. She was not planning to say, that they are disposable and that there are only ten of them. He would like to take them all, and she doesn't know how long this journey would last. In the end, these pads and tampons won't last forever.

 

They stopped to made a camp, when it was dusk. Beatrice put her sweatshirt on and then throw a backpack near the tree. She went to Bombur to ask, if she could help, but he sent her to Fili and Kili to gather the twigs for a fire. She walked with them deep into the forest and began to gather brushwood. The task was not hard, the woman still was in good mood, despite the aching thighs from riding and she involuntarily began to hum.

 

“That tune. What it is?” Fili asked, walking beside her.

 

Beatrice jumped, his sudden presence made anxiety run through her. She quickly calmed down and responded. From their expressions and the previous night, she concluded, that the dwarves really liked music and singing, though not everyone was good at it. Oin was one of that _not everyone_. The dwarrow had hearing problems and was often not synchronized with his comrades, but even then, their song was pleasant enough to listen to.

 

"You have a pretty voice, Miss Whitley," Kili said. “You should sing something to us.”

 

“No way!” she declined immediately. “Maybe I don't sing out of the tune, but it's still too much!”

 

Kili, seeing how nervous she was and being the little devil he was, speed up towards the camp and only after a moment Beatrice understood, what he wanted to do. The dwarrow loudly announced, that Beatrice will be entertaining them with a song tonight, and woman knew, that she had no choice, but to slip away after dinner.

 

She thanked for the meal and was about to go to her backpack, when Balin interrupted her, reminding her of her _duty_. Beatrice groaned, then gave Kili a deadly look. She sat down on the ground and began to wonder what songs she knew. Not only with lyric, but tune too. It also had to be interesting one, so they would enjoy it, at least in a small extent. _G_ _old digger_ was in her mind for many days now, but it wasn't the song they were ready for. She doubted that the time for it would ever come.

 

She cleared her throat and started to sing.

 

“ _He rode through the streets of the city,_ _down from his hill on high,_ _o_ _'er the wynds and the steps and the cobbles,_ _he rode to a woman's sigh,_ ” Her voice was quiet, but powerful. The only sounds, that accompanied her in the singing were the wood's crackling in the fire and her own heartbeat. “ _For she was his secret treasure, she was his shame and his bliss. And a chain and nothing, compared to a woman's kiss._ ”

 

Everyone looked at her enchanted as the flaming red light illuminated her face. During this time she had closed eyes, but at the last verse she opened them and her gaze met with the King's. She moved them quickly to the fire, when she began to sing the chorus.

 

“ _For hands of gold are always cold, but a woman's hands are warm_ ,” she sang. “ _For hands of gold are always cold, but a woman's hands are warm…_ ”

 

It was a short song she knew from one of the few fantasy books she have read. She had no idea why she chose it. Probably, because she listened to it last, before coming here. To Middle Earth.

 

"It's a sweet love song," Ori said finally.

 

"If you don't know the story behind of it, then yes, it is" she said with a weak smile. “It's really bitter tale.”

 

Nobody said anything, and the dwarves, who looked straight in her eye, encouraged her to tell them the story. She sat indian style, leaned her elbows on her thighs, and began to play with flowers in the grass.

 

“This song is about Tyrion Lannister, who was a high ranking official in the kingdom. His title was considered the most important, just after the king. Tyrion, however, unhappily fell in love. His beloved was a woman of easy virtue, Shae. His position didn't allow him to be in close contact with her, but he still brought her to the palace. Shae loved him, or at least he thought so. He gifted her a gold necklace, a symbol of his power, but soon everything began to fall apart. Tyrion was accused of murdering the king. His brother saved him the day before his execution. The same night, he discovers that the woman he loved, betrayed him. She didn't remained faithful not only in words, but also in flesh. Shae slept with his father. Tyrion killed her, before she managed to injure him with a dagger. He strangled her with the chain he had given her. With the chain, which was once less important than her.”

 

Beatrice left out many details and facts, because it would take much longer to tell the story of Tyrion, his family and Tysha. So she told a shortened version to show the meaning of the song.

 

She raised her gaze from the fire and stuck it back into the dwarves. Some looked really moved - especially Ori, who had tears in his eyes - and others wore a neutrality mask. Beatrice was not able to guess what was in their heads. One of them was Balin, who decided to express his feelings in words.

 

“That's why I pity Men. They never have a lifelong relationship, they do not have their other half.”

 

"So you dwarves have them?"

 

"Yes," he admitted uncertainly. "But it looks different than in other races."

 

“Different? How so?”

 

Balin looked to the side, and Beatrice followed him. He and Thorin looked at each other, as if they were able to convey their thoughts through telepathy. Thorin nodded and after this gesture Balin started talking again.

 

“In our society, there are very few females. There are six males on one female. Although now it probably changed as the last lass was born over twenty years ago. Since then, only lads. Fortunately, Mahal created us so that we, males, cannot see the difference between the sexes. Thanks to that, we are able to find our Ones, although they won't be a female.”

 

“So you pair up for life. Male with female, male with male. And the relationships between females?”

 

"Females can see the difference between genders," Gloin replied. “They have that ability to make the specie survive. That is why females are initiating the courtship. That's what my wife did.”

 

“So you're married, Mister Gloin. Anyone else?” Bombur and Balin answered her with _ay_ for confirmation. “And maybe someone have just found his One recently?”

 

No one replied, but Dwalin looked at Nori for a fraction of a second. Beatrice almost didn't noticed it. She already knew with whom she will ride in the near future.

 

She untangled her braid, which was destroyed by the trip, took a brush from her backpack, ran it through her hair to start making crown on her head, hoping it would survive longer than simple braid.

 

“And your people? How do they pair up?” Ori asked. There was a journal on his lap, and a pen in his hand. He was writing something all the time.

 

“Some people manage to connect successfully for life. However, many marriages end in divorce. Then people are looking for someone new again. Rarely is someone with only one person.”

 

“And it is allowed? "Dori said indignantly.

 

Beatrice shrugged.

 

“So how do you know that somebody won't leave you? That he will forever take care of you?” Fili asked.

 

“You don't.”

 

Kili rose abruptly and walked over to her.

 

“So do not marry your fiancee.”

 

Beatrice looked at him with wide eyes. Everyone always told her, that John was a perfect match for her, that she did well by accepting the ring from him. Kili was the first person to have a dissenting opinion and it was strangely pleasing to her. Thorin scolded the boy and Kili returned to his spot like a beaten puppy. Beatrice did not reply, she continued combing, lost in her thoughts. The dwarves noticed this and took care of their own affairs.

 

Ori's voice woke her from her thoughtfulness. He was now close to her, their shoulders almost touching.

 

“Do you miss him?”

 

 _Less than I should_ , she answered in her head.

 

"I do," she said, then put her head on his shoulder and fell asleep, not knowing that she was tired.

 

{*}

 

Beatrice was with the company for a week now. She changed dwarves, during the stops. Two dwarves per day, that was her routine. Riding with some was much less pleasant than with others.

 

Oin was quiet all the time, if you won't count his coughing over her ear, and smelling disgusting. Bombur, although he shared recipes with her and talked about his wife, was just too big and Beatrice could barely sit in the saddle. She passed to Ori, hoping she would be better there, but the shy dwarrow often lost control of the ponies, because of her presence. From Gloin and his constant chatter about the beauty of his wife and greatness of his son, she was getting migraines. She learned from him everything, that was possible about his family. Balin bore her with battle stories of people she never met.

 

That's why she knew she was going to ride with Gandalf, Bofur, Bifur, Dori, Nori, Fili and Kili.

 

Gandalf allowed her to do acrobatics of all kinds on his lap, Bofur was joking and telling her about his life, and Bifur - although he did not speak English - was the best companion. Only with him Beatrice felt relaxed and completely safe. Dori taught her about herbs and allowed her to smoke his pipe, when no one saw. Nori immediately informed her, who he was and what he did, before he became a member of the company. Beatrice only shrugged her shoulders. Fili and Kili told her about the pranks they made to their mom and uncle. She also learned, that Thorin was that uncle. She laughed for five minutes, before calming down and when she saw Thorin glancing at her, she started giggling again.

 

So it left Dwalin and Thorin for today. She could still ride with Bilbo, but when she watched him on pony, she preferred to give up. Early in the morning, after breakfast, she put her backpack on Dwalin's pony and waited for the warrior. He came and when he saw her, he sighed. He crouched down and folded his hands, so that Beatrice would be able to bounce on the animal. He sat behind her and slowly moved.

 

Beatrice felt strange tension. She didn't know, if it was because of the Dwalin's presence or the Thorin's proximity with whom she had not been in contact for several days. She was looking at him and then at a pony. Thorin and pony, Thorin and pony. She wasn't sure, if she should talk to them or just abstain from being social altogether.

 

Halfway through the ride, she remembered her plan. She used the moment, during which Thorin was busy conversing with Balin. She turned her head and whispered to Dwalin.

 

“So, you and Nori?”

 

The dwarrow started coughing suddenly as though he had choked on something. His actions drew attention to them. The king and his counselor looked at them curiously, and Beatrice smiled innocently. They looked at them for a few more seconds, but then they began to ignore them again.

 

"I have no idea what you're talking about," he growled.

 

"If that reaction wasn't a proof, then your eyes filled with longing and heat are," she laughed. Dwalin's shoulders tightened. “You do not have to answer, really. I'm just curious, that's all.”

 

"He's part of me," he whispered into her ear, saying everything, but still hiding a lot.

 

Beatrice leaned against his chest to get closer, so that their conversation would remain between them. She doubted Dwalin would ever talk to anyone about it. Not to his brother, not to his king. She could only speculate on why he wanted to talk about it with her. The main reason could be, that she was new, she was a stranger. Or he just had enough of holding it in, and she was in the right place at the right time.

 

"I never thought I would ever... I didn't think I would find him. We, dwarves, feel when we meet the right person. He or she becomes our mountain, our rock, our treasure. But there are dwarves, who rejects the bond. It is said to be an unbearable pain to bear. At first, I thought that was what he was doing, but he... He is just playing.”

 

"It's so typical of him," she chuckled. “But in the end, he will come to you. From what you said, he is a part of you, and you are a part of him. Not only you wish for closeness.”

 

Beatrice jumped off the pony and took her things to put them in Thorin's stuff. The woman was stressed out because of this part of the trip more than before any other. She took a slice of dried meat from the backpack, chewed on it and took a sip of water that Bifur gave her. When the company leader announced the end of the break, Beatrice tried to climb up onto the pony, though she didn't do it greatly. She couldn't understand why she wasn't able to climb the animal. Her muscles should make it easier for her. This helplessness caused a great inflow of irritation.

 

Anger turned into shock and a shock in embarrassment as Thorin's fingers grasped her waist and planted her in the saddle. Then dwarrow sat down behind her as if nothing had happened and Beatrice had no idea what to do with herself. Suddenly, she lost all self-confidence she had had with the opposite sex and while meeting him for the first time. She clenched her fingers at the horse mane, biting her lower lip. She took a breath in and then out. It's just Thorin Oakenshield, a fictional character - or not, Beatrice was not sure how it all worked, but she was slowly beginning to believe- and she had nothing to fear.

 

"Mister Thorin," she said to him. “Are my hands warm?”

 

She put them on his, so he could check. He nodded, knowing that she would feel it.

 

"Mister Thorin," she began again, her french accent very much hearable. “Would you like to feel gold or another person's warm flesh in your hands?”

 

He did not speak, but the hand on which Beatrice's hand laid twitched violently.

 

“Mister Thorin?”

 

”Yes, Miss Whitley? " he finally said. Beatrice heard annoyance in his voice, but also amusement.

 

“When will we be close to a stream? I feel my sweat and my clothes are dirty. I won't mention my greasy hair.”

 

Beatrice felt like king move behind her and then drew in deep breath. For a moment she thought that the dwarrow smelled her hair, but it was beyond the bounds of possibility. Right?

 

"Three more days, Miss Whitley. Give or take. You will definitely endure. And fret not, you do not smell bad. We dwarves have sensitive senses of smell, so we would know.”

 

Beatrice moaned in her mind. That's all she needed, really. Now dwarves will feel _everything_.

 

“Mister Thorin? Are you sure it's a right path? I wouldn't want us to lost our way. Twice.”

 

Dwarves, wizard and hobbit burst out laughing.

 

 

 

_**Thunder, feel the thunder  
Lightning and the thunder*** _

 

_*** Imagine Dragons - Thunder** _


	5. Beautiful People Beautiful Problems

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thorin is a jerk, dwarves are wet and Beatrice love her beauty sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't have a beta, so mistakes are somwhere in there. But well, shit happens.  
> It would be great, if someone would comment, but I don't push. Nope. It my self pity talking. Ignore it. Or not. But really, point my wrongs to me maybe? 
> 
> Enjoy!

_**Blue is the color on the shirt of the man I love  
He's hard at work, hard to the touch*** _

 

 

Thorin was right.

 

After two days of riding, they actually reached a small lake with a waterfall. The leader of the company ordered a stop much earlier than usual and the dwarves began to prepare the camp. Fili and Kili, as usual, went to gather firewood; Bombur, Dori and Bofur prepared the meal, and the rest bustled and looked like they were doing important things.

 

She was about to ask what she could do, when Balin stopped her, telling her to bath first, because they would like to enter the water after her. With great enthusiasm, she took the necessary items from her backpack, just after she embraced Balin for the good news.

 

She came into the water naked, but with dirty clothes in her hands, to wash them. The bra and panties were first, later blouse, sweatshirt and trousers. She put them on a stone, that stuck out of the water and began to rinse herself with water. It was not the perfect way to bathe, but she had no choice. She had no soap or bath oil. She had nothing that would completely wash off dirt and sweat, but she had to endure.

 

It was only, when she untangled her hair to wash them, that she noticed, she was humming. Usually she was singing in the shower, so she was not surprised at all. The words flowed out of her mouth and the girl began to move her hips. Beyonce's song had been tormenting her for several days, and now she could get out of her system.

 

„ _I know if I'm haunting you, you must be haunting me. My wicked tongue, where will it be? I know if I'm on to you, you must be on to me...”_ she stopped immediately, when she heard a rustle in the forest behind her.

 

She turned to the sound, but everything was quiet now. Beatrice smiled gently as she saw blond hair. She dived into the water, took a pebble and threw it in the right direction, as soon as she swam to the top. She heard a loud _ouch_ , but it belonged to Kili. Beatrice climbed over the rock and made sure, dwarves only saw her bare back, while she was sitting.

 

"There's no point pretending you're not there," she yelled.

 

“I apologize, Miss Whitley... We just... We have never...”

 

Beatrice immediately turned her head to make sure she was heard right. Not only Fili and Kili decided to peep on her, but the sweet, innocent Ori also. They seed to be the same age or maybe younger or older by two years. They behaved like horny teenagers in middle school. Beatrice didn't have time to respond, when shouting started. The three voyagers recognized them perfectly and shuddered.

 

Thorin and Dori walked in their direction with the same expressions. Beatrice also felt a chill of terror as she looked at their angry faces, though she did nothing wrong. Behind them was Nori, but his eyes were laughing. Beatrice pressed her knees to herself and turned gently to watch the upcoming spectacle.

 

Thorin and Dori's voices combined and the woman was unable to tell who was talking. But she understood what was the general outline of the talk. Older dwarves were not satisfied with the behavior of younger ones. She wanted to add something to defend Fili, Kili and Ori, but Nori's hand motion stopped her. So she closed her mouth and waited for them to finish.

 

“And you!” Thorin snapped at her. Beatrice flinched. She did not expect to be scolded. The king looked up at her, but he quickly averted his eyes.”You sit in there and show yourself like some... Like some harlot!”

 

Beatrice and the other present dwarves looked at Thorin in disbelief. He himself seemed to be surprised by his outburst too. She knew that the dwarrow was very easy to anger, that he was impatient, that he often speaks, before he thinks. She has noticed all these features during this short travel time. However, she did not think, she would ever encounter such a reaction. The shock quickly turned into annoyance. Beatrice's face has lost any expression. The sun shone brightly, but suddenly the girl felt chilly.

 

"Wait, I'm not sure, if I'm following you," she laughed, but it was a forced. "You blame me for the actions of the maturing dwarves, who have never seen a woman's body before and are just curious? Do you call me a harlot, because I showed a naked back? It's a bit ironic, because _your nephews_ spied on me, which, according to your logic, is appropriate. I wonder, from whom they have such distorted tastes. Maybe from someone they know?”

 

She smiled crookedly, then ordered them to go away with a hand gesture, saying that she had to dress herself. After a dozen minutes, the whole group returned. Thirteen dwarves and one hobbit with a meal for her. Gandalf, according to Bilbo, pursued somewhere in search of unknown. Beatrice took a bowl from Bilbo and wanted to go to the camp, which was – after all – close, but Dori stopped her and told her to stay with them, so they did not have to worry about her safety. Beatrice looked at Thorin, though he avoided her as if she was fire itself.

 

Without a word, she sat down on the ground with her back on them. She could hear the dwarves getting rid of many layers of clothes, how they entered the water, how they were joking, laughing.

 

"Mister Baggins, do not hide behind a stone," Bofur said cheerfully. "There is nothing to be ashamed of, we are all naked!'

 

"It's not a shame, Mister Bofur, but a bit of tact. It doesn't seem to be respectable...”

 

Their conversation was interrupted by Kili's loud scream. Beatrice immediately stood up and turned to see what was going on with the older of the brothers, the stew forgotten. All the dwarves stood looking at the spot, where Fili was just a moment ago. Balin grabbed Kili by the shoulder, when he wanted to go futher, telling him that he didn't know how to swim, that none of them didn't.

 

Fili could be seen for a moment on the surface, then began to sink again. Beatrice started to run, pulling off her trousers. She threw herself into the water and started to swim towards him. She grabbed him from the back, though in his shock, he hit her with his elbow in his ribs, then began to pull her to the bottom of the lake. Beatrice struggled to get out of his embrace. It was only a moment before he was weakening. Fili lost consciousness. She grabbed him again, came up and swam with him to the shore.

 

Dwarves helped her get out of the water and they took Fili. Beatrice coughed, getting rid of water from her lungs. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw how Oin approached the king's nephew, examined him, but he doesn't start resuscitate him. She got there somehow, walking on all fours and putting her ear to his heart. It was beating slow, very slow. She sat up and give him a heart massage. Then she tilted his head, wrapped her lips around his and began to breath into his mouth. After a second one, Fili awoke and began to cough. Beatrice collapsed to the ground, breathing heavily.

 

It took them a few minutes to calm down, before they realized that Fili was alive, that he was with them. Blond dwarrow looked at her and the first thing that came out of his was:

 

“So down there you have hair too.”

 

Beatrice laughed.

 

{*}

 

At first everything was fine.

 

However, day after day, Beatrice was feeling worse. It started with a runny nose. She used her tissues to make sure catarrh wasn't seen by others. One for the day. She has already used seven of them, and this week she could add such symptoms as coughing, cold and hot flashes and extreme fatigue, that made her barely able to hold onto a ponytail, and not every dwarrow could secure her.

 

Her cough was dry and sounded like she was going to spit out her lungs. Eventually, Oin gave her a mixture of honey and smashed onion. It made her throat less sore and cough was getting better, but nothing that Oin gave her, healed her completely. At the end of the week, she could not ride with many dwarves, because they weren't able to maneuver the pony and keep her in saddle, when she was almost unconscious. She ride with Gandalf, Thorin, Dwalin and Dori. She often snuggle into them and fell asleep.

 

Finally, she got fever and only Gandalf was able to look after her properly, while riding. Fili and Kili lay beside her at night, sharing their warmth with her. In this way they expressed their gratitude. And although they were not very close with her, the brothers felt they had to take care of her, as if she was an abandoned kitten. Beatrice would have argued had it not been for her lack of strength.

 

Nine days after the situation in the lake, they found themselves on an abandoned farm. Fili seated her between his legs as they sat under the tree. Dwarves dealt with the camp, and Thorin argued with the wizard. Beatrice sighed heavily. May God protect her from the stubbornness of the dwarves!

 

“Fili! Kili!” Thorin shouted. “Watch the ponies. Someone will bring you food later.”

 

"But Beatrice..." Fili began, pointing at the huddled girl.

 

"I'll replace you," he answered shortly.

 

Fili stood up and Thorin slipped into his place. Beatrice's body tensed up as Thorin's arms wrapped around her to give her more warmth. They did not talk about the hurtful words they exchanged. She was accustomed to being close to his body, but she still hoped he would apologize and she would also do so. But there was silence between them.

 

After a few minutes she relaxed and leaned comfortably on his chest. Thorin seemed to think she was asleep, as he began to stroke her hair and Beatrice even thought she felt his chin on her head, but she wasn't sure. The dwarrow's movements were soothing, and although Beatrice fought the urge to sleep, she knew she would not last long.

 

“No, Thorin... I don't wanna sleep...”

 

“Shhh, Beatrice, sleep. And when you wake up, you'll feel better.”

 

Beatrice surrendered and fell into deep slumber, when a low voice made her sleep. She woke up when it was dawn. She looked around the camp and when she did not see anyone, she panicked. Immediately, she get up. She regretted it just as quickly. Her body was weak and it refused to obey. But she knew she had to find them. Their things were still here.

 

Slowly, she began to walk towards the ponies to see if they were there. She found the destroyed part of the forest, so she followed the trail on a jelly legs, wanting to find her companions as soon as possible. She stopped only, when she saw three huge, rocky monuments. She stared at the ugly faces of the creatures and wondered what they were. Then she remembered how Tolkien described the company's first obstacle. Trolls. Beatrice shuddered at the thought, that she might have met them, before they turned into stone.

 

"You shouldn't get up," Dori said to her.

 

Beatrice only now noticed that the rest was also here and out of sacks. Beatrice counted them to make sure they were all here. When she was sure there was fifteen of them, she localized Bilbo, ran toward him and threw her arms around him. She was happy and full of relief, because nothing had happened to him.

 

“All is fine, Beatrice. I'm all right.”

 

"Mister Baggins," They heard from the side.

 

She knew that tone. Irritated, damning. She stepped away from Bilbo to look at the king. His facial expression also was not foreign to her. The annoyance was very visible on his face. Beatrice held out her index finger to point at him.

 

"Do not even try, Mister Oakenshield. Whatever you want to say, keep it to yourself. We already know, that you are choose words poorly, when you aren't in control of your emotions.”

 

She spoke with a voice cold like ice and razor sharp. Thorin stared at her for a moment, though he quit. He went to Dwalin to send some of the dwarves to the camp for the rest of their belongings, and now they would go looking for the trolls's cave.

 

She walked the same pace with the Ri brothers. while Bilbo was in front of her and talked about something with Bofur and Bombur. Beatrice smiled.

 

“He worries about you.”

 

Beatrice looked confusedly at Nori.

 

“Bilbo?”

 

"Thorin," Dori answered. “When you fell asleep, he watched over you and get the fever down. Forgive him for his crudely behavior. He... isn't adept at apologizing with words.”

 

Beatrice looked at Thorin's figure entering the cave. She knew Dori was right. She knew it, but she couldn't allow herself to be different, because then she would start feeling something. Something, that she thought was reserved only for John.

 

_**  
My heart is soft, my past is rough*** _

 

_*** Lana del Rey - Beautiful People Beautiful Problems** _


	6. Titanium

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Company needs to escape, Beatrice is a badass, and Kili is embarassing himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i wanted to post this chapter ealier, but i am a lazy shit, so i didn't. oh well. in my defense, i was on a Stephen King's marathon. Did any of you watched "IT" already? i love this movie.

_**Raise your voice, sticks and stones may break my bones *** _

 

 

Nori groaned. The stench coming off from cave was unbearable, but he still went inside and explored the treasure of trolls.

 

Beatrice watched closely as Nori hid the coins he had found in his pocket, and when he saw that he had been caught by her, Nori smiled wickedly. The woman laughed, sitting on a rock. Her laugh attracted Dori's attention. He was looking at her, then at Nori, but the pair was already looking at him innocently.

 

Nori, only after Gloin's request, began to bury the rest of the treasure. Beatrice wanted to help, but her body was still too weak and she barely stood on her feet. Thorin called them and Bofur, Gandalf went to Bilbo, and Dori to her. He held a long sword in his hands. If she was her normal height, weapon would be perfect for her. But now it was comically big, when Dori handed it over to her.

 

"It's light and it should be easy to use, despite its length," he said. Beatrice took the blade out of the holder. She had to admit, the sword wasn't heavy. She could easily hold it in one hand. “I would like to teach you how to use it. I know you said, that you know how to fight, but that does not help with orcs and wargs. We don't know how long your trip with us will last.”

 

Beatrice hid the sword and then hugged Dori with one arm, to show gratitude, and agreed to the lessons. The dwarrow was right. She did not know how much time she would spend here, and fighting skills definitely would be useful. She did not have a strap, to which she could attach the weapon, so she held it with both hands. Dori promised to do something for her later.

 

“Something's coming!” Thorin shouted.

 

Nori dragged her behind him, when they ran into the woods. The man, who harnessed the rabbits, closed off on them them. _Rabbits_. A pack of rabbits pulled the sled. Beatrice looked at him, not knowing what she should do. Gandalf seemed to know this man and be in good contact with him. Beatrice looked up and opened her mouth to scold him for using poor little animals for something so tiresome. She refrained, seeing the man remove the worm from his tongue. Beatrice frowned, feeling disgusted.

 

Suddenly she heard a howl. She and a company turned toward the sound.

 

“Was that a wolf? Are there are there wolves out there?” Bilbo asked horrified.

 

“Wolves? No, that is not a wolf.” Bofur replied, his body posture turning defensive.

 

A huge animal jumped out of the trees and leaped into Dori. Beatrice backed away, holding her sword with trembling hands, but before she could thrust it into wolf's neck, Thorin did it. She didn't have time to look at the dead body as another creature appeared. Kili shot it, before animal attacked Thorin, and Dwalin finished it.

 

Beatrice leaned over the animal. She touched him uncertainly. The beast looked like a huge wolf, its fur was soft and thick, though mouth open in pain were showing, that he was a predator, were showing his sharp fangs, which could have sink in Dori's throat, if it wasn't for Thorin. She was sorry for the creature, but she knew that they had no choice.

 

Nori pulled her up, but Beatrice's knees get a little weak. Not because of illness, but because what has just happened. She looked at the dwarrow. She had to look terrified, because he clenched her wrist and even though they were forced to run, he did not let go.

 

Beatrice saw as the wizard pulled riding wargs orcs away. Beatrice wanted to remind them of their ponies, but Nori shook his head. She realized, that there was no rescue for them anymore. They hid behind rocks and then ran again. They did so several times, until finally Beatrice could not stand it. At the next stop, she snatched her hand out of Nori's grip, leaned on her knee, and put another hand to her chest. She was panting, the weakness associated with the illness slowed her down, and her body seemed to be in shape no longer.

 

“Where are you leading us?”she heard Thorin say as she passed by him. Gandalf didn't answer him.

 

She could hear wargs growling, she could hear the whistle of the wind, the rustle of her clothes, and her loud breath. She was scared, but she tried to stay calm, because she knew she would die otherwise. Dori pressed her against the rock and only after a moment she understood why.

 

Kili leaped forward, draw a bow and shot. Warg fell from the rock and rolled to the ground. There was a second of silence. Beatrice could hear the loud beating of her heart. Dwarves rushed to kill an undead orc, and he groaned loudly. She knew what that meant. The rest would notice them. They started running again. It was impossible, however, to outrun the huge wolves. Beatrice was aware of this. She really was, but she didn't expect what had come. Gandalf shouted to follow him, but she did not manage to do so.

 

Something heavy hit her. Beatrice fell to the ground with a thud. She heard its snarls, she could feel hot breath on her neck. She turned to her back and at the same moment gigantic paw appeared on her chest. The warg was firmly close to her face, and Beatrice was ready to swear she almost lost consciousness. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Kili running into the cave, Thorin behind him. They did not notice her. She was on her own.

 

_I want to live. I want to go back to home._

 

She reached out and grabbed the sword she had dropped during the fall. She pulled it out of the scabbard and dug into the animal's head. Blood splashed on her face and clothes. She quickly slide out of the wolf, so that i wouldn't fall on her, pulling out her sword. She wanted to follow the dwarves, but roar stop her. Orc, who lay under warg and many others, fell down from the shots.

 

Beatrice was surrounded by people riding horses. But they were not humans. They had pointed ears, long, shiny hair and beautiful faces. They were elves. The woman calmed down. From what she remembered, the elves were helpful and friendly. She hid the sword. The elves spoke in a language, that she did not understand, and then one of them spoke to her. His hair in the sunlight seemed to be purple.

 

"Why did the wargs-riders chase you, _titta ohtar_?"

 

"It's a long story, mister elf," she said, her voice weak. “Could you help me? I lost my companions. They passed this way.”

 

Beatrice pointed to the rock. Elf smiled and then stepped off the horse.

 

“This road leads to only one place. To Rivendell. You will meet them there, "he said, helping her onto his horse, then sat down behind her. “My name is Elrond, young one. What are you called?”

 

“Nice to meet you, Lord Elrond. My name is Beatrice.” she said, remembering him from the movie.

 

They moved. Horses galloped through the fields. Beatrice grabbed the mane of the animal, afraid of falling. She moved her left leg to squeeze her thigh harder, and her calf hit the body of the horse. She squealed in pain and suddenly she ran out of breath. For a moment she had difficulty breathing, and then began coughing as if she was going to spit out her guts.

 

The elf's slender fingers fell beneath her breasts and began to examine her ribs. When she coughed again, he put his hand on her back and then to her forehead.

 

"Looks like you have an open wound on your leg and broken ribs, _titta ohtar_ ," he said after the test.” Also fever starts to take over your body. I will tell my healers to take care of you, when we arrive.”

 

"Thank you," she whispered hoarsely. “Can you tell me what _tita ohar_ means?

 

Lord Elrond chuckled.

 

"'Little warrior'," Beatrice turned to allow him to see her eyebrows high up. "You stood there with blood on you, with a sword in your hands and determination in your eyes.”

 

Beatrice laughed.

 

“I'm not able to use it. The adrenaline and fear made me kill, not bravery.”

 

"But you did not hesitate.“

 

Beatrice didn't argue with him anymore. Her attention was taken over by the views around her. It was quiet, quiet and pleasant. The smell of flowers and fresh water floated in the air. They soon came closer to tall buildings and towers. They crossed the bridge and Beatrice was breathless as she saw the setting sun reflect in the water. She noticed that other elves began to encircle something on their stallions and she leaned forward to see what was going on.

 

In the center of the circle stood dwarves ready to fight. Beatrice smiled and waved at those who saw her. And they started to elbow the others, and so the company learned that she was alive and was with them. It was not difficult to deduce why they did not return. They thought she was killed. How could she survive?

 

Relief could be seen on their faces. Elrond jumped off of his horse, then took Beatrice in his arms and began to walk towards Gandalf. Beatrice calmed the dwarves with a glance, showing that everything was fine. Thorin frowned though. Elf talked to the wizard, and Beatrice slowly began to descend from Elrond, as if he was a tree, to get to the one dwarrow she was thinking about now. Her movement earned amused looks of several elves watching her. She winked and passed Thorin, who was now talking to Elrond.

 

She stood in front of Kili with her fists on her hips. The smile, that appeared on his face at her sight disappeared.

 

“What were you thinking? This warg wouldn't see us, if we stopped breathing for a moment, he would stop to be interested!”

 

“Uncle gave the order!”

 

Beatrice turned toward Oakenhield. He shivered under her intense gaze, although he quickly reflected. The woman came closer to him.

 

"What if that warg would fall somewhere else? What if he fell on any of us? On Bilbo or me? We would not survive this! It would have crushed us! And finally, they found out we were there. In addition, Kili could hit the wrong spot, warg would have carry on and would attack him!”

 

"Beatrice, nothing happened," Fili reassured her. “Kili is alive, everything is okay. No one was injured.”

 

Fili quickly figured out what she really meant.

 

"Besides the little creature," said the elf with gold hair, which raised her. "You left her alone on the battlefield, but she did well.”

 

He brushed her hair off her face. Dwarves only just have noticed the blood on her clothes and the wound on her leg. Beatrice sighed, her anger ceased. She knew Thorin had made a good decision at the time, but she was angry that they hadn't come back for her. She understood why, but irrational side of her still was embittered. Elrond with a motion of his head give the elf permission to go. She figured it was all about her wounds.

 

He put her on a bed in the room, which, he said, was supposed to be hers now. He went out, and moments later came the female elf, who introduced herself as Elanil. She helped her with bath, washed and dried her hair, and then dressed her. Beatrice repeatedly said she could do it herself, but the elf ignored her. There were no shoes to match her size, so Beatrice was forced to walk barefoot. Although she was promised that she would be given a proper dress, coat and shoes for the journey, so she did not have to worry.

 

Before clothing her, Elanil smeared her ribs and calf with her ointment and then checked for fever. Beatrice had an increased temperature, but Elanil said the food and sleep would fix it. When Beatrice was looking presentable, she-elf took her to the dining room, where the dwarves were sitting, and the elves played harps. Beatrice greeted them with a smile.

 

She sat down beside Dwalin and started to put different salads on the plate. There were plenty of them and she wanted to try every of them. She was about to bit a piece of strawberry, when Ori began to whine. Later, Dwalin started to rummage in a salad for meat. Beatrice hit him on the palm.

 

“What are you doing?” she hissed. "We are guests here, so let's show that we have class. Eat what you were given and show respect. You aren't savages, are you?”

 

She began to eat and the others followed her. She put a slice of lettuce in her mouth and looked up. Kili stared into distance with a dreamy eyes. She directed her eyes to the same spot, where she saw a beautiful elf playing the harp. She turned back to him at the moment Kili was winking at the elf. Having noticed that he had been caught by her, Bofur and Dwalin, he began to explain.

 

”Can’t say I fancy elf maids myself. Too thin. They’re all high cheekbones and creamy skin, not enough facial hair for me. Although…” Beatrice followed his gaze once more and almost laughed. “That one there’s not bad.”

 

Beatrice cleared her throat.

 

”Kili, darling, it's not an elf maiden.”

 

Everyone burst out laughing.

 

 

 

_**You shoot me down but I won't fall  
I am titanium *** _

 

_*** David Guetta ft. Sia - Titanium** _


	7. Sharp edges

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dwarves are naked, they all are having fun and Beatrice sings. Again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> last one was later, so this one i updated earlier. because i can. enjoy this little thing, darlings! :)

_**Sharp edges have consequences  
I guess that I had to find out for myself *** _

 

 

 

They had been resting in Rivendell for a week now and weren't ready for the trip yet.

 

Firstly, because they could not read the map, until the moon was in the same place just like then, when the map was created, and the friend Gandalf mentioned in Bag End had not appeared.

 

The thought, that this was the end of her stay in Middle Earth made her feel excited and sad at the same time. She was overjoyed, because she would come home, to her family, to John, to friends, to a world, that she knows and understands and feels safe in there. But she knew she would miss those she met here. She would miss Bilbo's kindness, Ori's shyness, Fili and Kili's foolishness, Dori's safe aura. And Thorin. She would miss him too. Maybe even more than the rest.

 

She set out to look for the dwarves to enjoy their presence a little more, before returning home. Bilbo said she would find them at the large fountain in the garden, so there she went waltzing. In her dreamy enjoying the views and smells, she almost bumped into Elrond walking with another elf. They did not do anything of her presence, so Beatrice decided to see what attracted their attention.

 

She stood beside them and saw them exchanging terrified looks. They looked less beautiful and much older than their smooth faces suggested. She followed their gaze and stood still. Thirteen dwarves bathed in a fountain. Naked. After a moment she realized, she shouldn't be surprised. They are dwarves after all. This sentence often appeared in her head as an explanation for their behavior.

 

She moved towards them. She walked quickly with a clenched jaw, ignoring her cloak blowing in the wind. Elves, fulfilling her request, prepared for her a cloth similar to the previous one. Trousers that clung to her legs and loose tunic, and a coat on it. They also gave her high boots, that reached her knees. Beatrice hoped she would be given back her things, before going home. She already could imagine looks of the people, who saw her walk in this attire through the streets.

 

She stopped and looked at them. They ran, laughed, splashed water at each other. Anger curled up in Beatrice. She understood good fun, but they could do it in a less public place so as not to offend their hosts. She cleared her throat, but no one heard her. She took a deep breath and screamed. The dwarves immediately stopped fooling around and were ready to attack. They relaxed, seeing her. That was a mistake.

 

She gave them a look full of disgust and disappointment. When her eyes met Thorin's, she felt even more ashamed of them and he apparently saw this because he looked away. Beatrice did not hide the anger in her voice.

 

“What do you think you are doing?" she asked.

 

"We're washing ourselves, of course," Kili replied, unaware of danger.

 

Beatrice nodded, showing that she had got the message. A cool mask on her face.

 

"Why don't you do it in the baths prepared for you?" Kili opened his mouth to answer her, but Fili elbowed him, sensing that it was a rhetorical question. “Your behavior on the first night here was rude, but what you are doing now is pure crudeness. I thought that when you get your _desired_ meat and sleep, you will calm down. But it didn't happen. You act like a bunch of swines. I expected more from the king and his subjects.”

 

"You're throwing lightly heavy words," Balin said.

 

Beatrice snorted.

 

“Of course. I am a woman. It means being right even when I am wrong.”

 

She turned on her heel and walked away, unaware of how majestic she sounded and looked. Thorin could swear his heart stopped for a moment. Then she yelled the three sentences, that allowed him to made a decision.

 

“And Nori! If you wanted Dwalin's ass so much, you should say so. I'm sure he will be happy to grant your wish. So don't stare at his cock anymore!”

 

 

{*}

 

Beatrice spent the whole day with Dori, Nori and Ori.

 

Dori's hobbies were herbs, teas and their application. He showed her his tea collection, gave her a pipe, so she could try different blends. Other dwarves watched them, but Beatrice was still angry at them. Somehow it was easier to forgive Ri's brothers than all the rest and she didn't know why. Bilbo wandered around Rivendell and she could not spend time with him, unfortunately.

 

She caught Nori putting elf valuables in his backpack. She raised her eyebrows up, but she didn't have the strength to scold him. She doubted she would ever be able to snarl at Nori. He did bad things, robbed the people, yet Beatrice forgave him everything, because he had the mischievous glint of his eye and the smile of a Cheshire cat.

 

Ori asked her to pose for him, and she done that from time to time. She sat down in the indian style near the wall and watched as the young dwarf moved the pencil. It took him more time than she thought, because he wanted to capture every detail of her face. Beatrice smiled at this and then did not speak. He finished at the moment, when Fili, Kili, Bofur and Bifur brought into the room - where the dwarves made their living room, dining room, kitchen and bedroom - two kegs.

 

They and the other dwarves looked incredibly delighted by the find. Beatrice approached them and her eyes gleamed as she saw the wine. She missed her trips with friends to the clubs and sitting down on the couch to watch Netflix with a bottle of red sweet wine. Bombur gave everyone the cups and the rest created a queue to get to the liquid.

 

Beatrice stared at the red blood colored liquid and then sipped. The wine had a fruity flavor, was strong and delicious. She licked her lips, pleased like a cat that got cream. Her eyes met Thorin's again that day. Her eyes were laughing and his were dark. His gaze was intense and she shuddered.

 

She drank sip after sip, cup after cup. She became more and more dazed. She took active part in the conversations and jokes with the dwarves, although at first some of them considered this to be inappropriate. Dori and Nori drew flutes, Bombur drum, Balin violin, Bifur clarinet, and Thorin harp. They started to play. Dwalin, Gloin and Oin were stomping their feet. Ori, Bofur, Fili and Kili started to dance. Beatrice took the last sip, pulled off her cloak and joined the dwarves.

 

Ori danced with her like he would with a lady. Carefully, as if one wrong move would make her run away. Bofur was more courageous. He pulled her from one end of the room to the other, still forcing her to jumps. Fili and Kili were not better. They turned her around until she finally collapsed with laughter on the floor, and the world around her swirled. Beatrice refilled her mug with alcohol and decided to ask other dwarves to dance. The energy in her was boiling, and the percentages made her bold.

 

Firstly, she grabbed Dwalin. The dwarrow resisted for a moment, but somehow he was persuaded. He was not a bad dancer and Beatrice had a great time with him. Later, Dori asked for a dance. He was delicate, even gentler than Ori. It was as though he thought that a stronger jerk to the side would make her fall apart. Once again, she swallowed wine, this time to add courage in what she wanted to do.

 

She rubbed her lips with the back of her hand to get rid of the liquid from her lips and then walked over to the king. She reached out and tilted her head to one side and smiled, encouraging him. He took her hand and went to the dance floor. He led her to the rhythm of the music and it took him a moment to relax.

 

"I apologize for my words," he said, turning her around. “Then, by the lake. And for our today's behavior. I- we went out of line.”

 

He did not give her excuses, he did not explain anything, but for Beatrice it was enough. She had no right to demand proper behavior from them. She was not part of the company, but Thorin had taken her feelings into account and confessed his guilt. Not only with how they behaved in Rivendell, but also with the words spoken earlier.

 

"All right," she said. “I know you do not think so. In the end, you have a good heart.”

 

She smiled widely. Thorin stopped suddenly, and Beatrice bumped into his chest while stepping forward. She lifted her head up to ask what had happened, but she wasn't fast enough. The dwarrow latched on to her waist, raised her up, and began to swirl. Beatrice grabbed him by the shoulders and the longer they were spinning around, the more amused she was. But only when she saw Thorin's delicate smile, she began to laugh. Dwarves whistled, stomped and clapped their hands.

 

The king set her down on the floor, and Beatrice bit her lip, unable to meet his gaze. For a strange, unknown reason, she was embarrassed. She wanted to leave Thorin, because the song was over and on the other side, she wanted stay with him. With the hands on his body, chest near chest. Nothing beautiful could last forever, couldn't it?

 

“Now your turn, Miss Whitley!” Bombur shouted. “Sing something for us!”

 

Beatrice reluctantly stepped away from the company leader. She took the cup that Fili was holding and drank its contents. If she was to sing again, she must have been drunk as fuck. She stood in the middle of the hall, facing the audience. She did not think long over the song, she just started to sing.

 

“ _Looks like you've been starving. You've got those hungry eyes. You could use some sugar 'cause your levels are not right,_ “ Beatrice was supposed to sing only, but she wasn't able to stop. She began to move her hips, stretched her arms up and started maneuvering them there. Later on, she began to untangle her fish braid. Her eyes half open, playful smile on her lips. Seductive mode has been turned on. “ _Hope you've got some room for the world's best cherry pie. Gonna hit that sweet tooth, boy._ ”

 

When she sang the last sentence, she send a wink to Bofur. The dwarrow whistled, encouraging her to make further twists. She began to turn around her own axis, still singing. Slowly she was short of breath from the simultaneous dance and singing. She slipped her fingers into her hair and began to mess them up.

 

“ _Cause I'm all that you want, boy. All that you can have, boy. Got me spread like a buffet. Bon appétit, baby.”_ she finished the song with a jump.

 

She bowed and there was a moment of silence. She looked at them uncertainly, but quickly calmed down as they applauded. She grinned and bowed once again. The dwarves made her place among them and she fell down on the cushions there. She laughed loudly, sat and acted gracelessly. However, the alcohol that circulated in her veins was not interested in courtesy. Beatrice felt her red cheeks, felt that her hair was glued to her sweaty face.

 

“Didn't my dance horrify you?"she stuttered. “Sometimes you seem so old-fashioned, and the next moment you do things you shouldn't talk about in the company.”

 

"Hush, lass," Balin said. “We appreciate your skills. You showed us your muscles, your strength and your grace. There is nothing to be ashamed of.”

 

Beatrice nodded and then leaned against the table behind her. Her felt dizzy and it was buzzing in her ears. She knew she had to stop drinking and eat something. She put a grape into her mouth and looked at the dwarves. It didn't go well for her, because she slowly lost contact with her surroundings.

 

In her state between unconscious and awareness, Beatrice thought of her family. About how she missed them and wanted to hug them all. About friends who could cheer her up. About John, who was her fiance. She should be happy, she should stick to good thoughts, hope. Now that she was alone with her thoughts and allowed her fears to speak, Gandalf's words sounded louder than when she heard them for the first time.

 

"My friend will be coming soon," said the wizard a few days earlier. “Maybe she will be able to help you.”

 

He said _maybe,_ but Beatrice only heard the promise of returning home. Eyes started to fill with tears. She was afraid she was going to cry out here and now, if she did not do something. She recovered her vision and started looking for Bilbo. She jerked, noticing Thorin sitting close to her.

 

“You know maybe where is Bilbo?” she asked weakly.

 

"I'm sorry, but no, I do not" he replied. “Do you need something?”

 

Beatrice ignored him, then strode forward to a new destination. Dori looked at her in amazement as she climbed onto his knees and clenched her fingers on his tunic. She slid her face into the gap between his shoulder and neck, and began to sob. Dwarves stopped their celebration. There were only sounds of a broken woman crying in the room. Dori rock her like a child and whispered reassuring words. Nobody asked anything. Beatrice was grateful for that.

 

Beatrice cried, because, in the depths of her soul she knew, she would never be able to return home.

 

 

_**We all fall down** _ _**  
** _ _**We live somehow** _ _**  
** _ _**We learn what doesn't kill us makes us stronger*** _

 

*Linkin Park – Sharp edges  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beatrice sings Katy Perry song 'Bon appetit'. Let me know what do you think of this chapter! :)


	8. He lives in you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Beatrice cries, Dori is a mother hen and Thorin makes a plan.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm late, sorry. i was on a little vacation, but here i am now. Enjoy it, my darlings.

_**There's no mountain too great  
Hear the words and have faith* ** _

 

 

Beatrice had swollen eyes, a red face, and looked as if she was about to cry. Again.

 

She was not sitting in Dori's arms, but Bifur's, because even if he wanted to ask her, if she was okay, he could not. The language barrier interfered with it. She forced the dwarrow to have his knees bent, she put herself between them, and rested her head on his knee. Dori sent her a hurt look, apparently preferring Beatrice to be with him now. Bombur gave her a bowl full of food, but she refused, saying she had no appetite. When a large, warm hand began to smooch her back, she did not protest. She closed her eyes and opened them only when she heard Gandalf call for her.

 

“It's time, Beatrice.”

 

The woman got up, sent the dwarves a reassuring smile and left. She followed the wizard into the gardens, where the female elf was waiting for her. She was tall, her hair like gold. She copied Gandalf and bowed, introducing herself.

 

"I know who you are, aiwe," she said, her voice like millions of bells. "I'm Galadriel of Lóthlórien. Follow me, aiwe. I have something to show you.”

 

Beatrice followed her, careful not to step on her long robes. They walked slowly into the garden and the elf did not speak to her. The woman tried to stop the nervousness, but with every step she felt more and more nauseated. Galadriel stopped by a small pond. Beatrice leaned forward and saw the colorful fish.

 

She jerked as cold fingers touched her bare neck. The elf waved and the water in the pond moved. Beatrice looked at her.

 

"Do not be afraid, aiwe," she said. “The path leading back home will be difficult and many obstacles will be on your way. You will have to make choices that won't be easy.”

 

“When? When will I be able to go home?” she asked, grabbing the elf's robes. Beatrice felt like a little child begging for mother.

 

"When the choice is the hardest," she said, looking straight into her eyes. Beatrice frowned.” You have to leave with the dwarves. They will take you where you should be.”

 

Beatrice nodded. Hope came back to her and she felt great and awful at the same time. She cried for about half of the night, company was worried about her, and she could return home.

 

“Do you wish to see your family? "Galadriel asked as Beatrice headed for the exit. Beatrice turned away violently and almost fell over, running back to her. She nodded. “Look at the water.”

 

Beatrice did as the elf told. The water surface began to change and instead of her reflection, she began to see the shapes of other people. Firstly, saw her father. He was dressed in his expensive suit. His face showed no emotion. Later she saw her sister, her fiancé hugged her. She was crying and she was dressed in black dress. Many other people also were dressed in dark colors. Beatrice looked at this surreal scene, not knowing what was going on. She did not hear anything, but the water showed her everything.

 

She was looking at eyes full of tears, sadness on the faces of the gathered, ubiquitous blackness. She denied what she had deducted. She told herself it was impossible, that this could not happen. But everything confirmed her guesses. The final proof was the face of the person lying in the coffin.

 

Her mother's face was pale, though she had seen pink on her cheeks. Her lips and eyelids also were painted. She was dressed in her favorite blue dress. Her tiny body seemed to be even smaller.

 

Water has returned to its previous state. Beatrice saw herself and tears flowing down her cheeks. She did not make any sound, she was in such a big shock. She walked away from the pond without a word, ignoring the eyes of elves. She stopped by one of the balconies in the west wing. She leaned on the balustrade and began to breathe deeply. Slowly, this painful fact reached her, but she did not want to accept it. She was looking at the setting sun and remembered how her mother sang her lullabies at bedtime in her childhood. How she danced while cooking. How she played with her hair. How delighted she was with Disney movies.

 

“ _Ingonyama nengw 'enamabala. Ingonyama nengw 'enamabala,_ "she whispered. Her voice was quiet, weak. Only after a moment of singing her voice did gain power. She did not sing in tune, sobs interfered with that, but she wanted to get it ff her chest so much. This despair, the pain. She wanted to do everything her mother would want her to do. “ _He lives in you, he lives in me. He watches over everything we see. Into the waters, into the truth, in your reflection, he lives in you*._ ”

 

Last sentence she shouted with her eyes closed, so that the wind would carry the words away. She fell to the floor and began to whimper. She was not there at such important moment. Her mother died, and she was not there. She could not comfort her father, she could not hug her sister, she could not be with them. She didn't know what have happened, why it have happened. She was here. She acted as though her world stopped and waited for her return. But time was flowing. It passed, it didn't wait for her. Beatrice hid her face in her knees. A great fear and anxiety overwhelmed her. What did they have thought about her disappearance? How much worried were they? She just disappeared. And she never came back. Did they think she escaped? That she was missing? What did they think?

 

Beatrice felt strong arms embracing her. She lifted her head and saw Dori's sad eyes. He picked her up and began to walk with her into the common dwarves room. Conversations ceased as they entered and Beatrice felt even worse. She had made them worry with her crying and she would bring them more problems during their journey.

 

Dori had her sit between his legs and began humming something in an unfamiliar for Beatrice language. Melody was calming, and Beatrice relaxed.

 

“She have done that too. She sang and stroked the top of my head to stop me crying. I was a very tearful child and she had to do it often, "she said with her eyes closed. Question _who_ hung in the air. "My mom did, but she won't do that again. Even if I manage to come back home.”

 

Dwarves understood what she wanted to convey with these words. So they returned to the conversations and let Dori, the most affectionate of them, deal with the matter. The dwarrow clamped on her shoulders, hugging her tighter. Beatrice looked at the spot over Ori's head for a long time, but when the sun disappeared behind the horizon and the candles were lit, she said.

 

"Braid my hair, please?"

 

Dori knew that Beatrice didn't know their customs, but it didn't change the fact, that he felt honored. He pulled out a comb from his backpack and started combing her hair and then making several thin braids. This work lasted a long time and only when Dori was halfway through braiding, Nori approached them.

 

"You were right," he said, sitting next to her. "He agreed when I asked nicely.”

 

Beatrice blinked several times. She looked at him and then at Dwalin, again at him. She smiled, but for all the gathered it was a crooked and sad smile. Dori fastened the last bead on her braid and Beatrice thought it was over. She was wrong. Nori and Ori approached her and replaced two of them with another. Beatrice raised her eyebrows up but did not ask for anything.

 

“Mister Dori, I would like to apologize for my yesterday and today's behavior.”

 

"There's nothing to apologize for, my dear. And please, call me Dori. In the end, we're the family from today.”

 

Beatrice tightened her hand on his.

 

"Thank you, Dori," she whispered, and the dwarrow hit his forehead with her. This gesture was alien to her, but nice. “I apologize, but I still have to talk with Mister Thorin.”

 

"Not today, lass," Nori said. “You are tired and it's late. Whatever you have to tell him, you can do it tomorrow.”

 

Beatrice didn't have the strength to disagree. She lay down in her sleeping bag - she had no idea who set it up and who she should thank - and when her head touched the pillow, she fell asleep.

 

{*}

 

Beatrice woke up more tired than when she lay down.

 

She was sitting in her sleeping bag, rubbing her eyes to get rid of the rest of her sleep. She yawned loudly, then stretched. She left it, didn't tidy up, and began walking toward the dwarves sitting at the table. As she walked, she tied the braids in a high ponytail, so it would not fall into her eyes. Wooden beads hit the metal ones. Nori moved away so she could sit between him and Dori.

 

“Did you sleep well?” asked the eldest of the Ri brothers. “We left you breakfast, Bombur is already making you tea.”

 

"Thank you," she said. Her voice was hoarse, so she cleared her throat and thanked them again. She started to eat bread with honey. She looked around. “Where is Mister Thorin? I need to talk with him.”

 

"I'm here," answered the voice from behind. Beatrice turned and stood up to talk to him in private. He stopped her by putting hand on her shoulder. “Eat peacefully, no hurry. I will be on the balcony.”

 

Beatrice nodded and went back to eating. She wanted to finish as soon as possible, so that Thorin did not have to wait too long and she could talk about joining the company as soon as possible. She ate hungrily, she almost choked a few times, but Dori made sure she would eat slowly and calmly and drink all the tea. After a quarter of an hour she could join the king.

 

"I'm sorry you had to wait that long, Mister Thorin," she said, standing beside him. The dwarrow stared into the distance, as if he was now able to see the Lonely Mountain.”I would like to talk with you about the journey.”

 

"You allowed Dori to braid your hair," he ignored her statement. He turned to face her and grabbed one of her braids. “He, Nori and Ori gave you their beads. Do you know what that means?”

 

"I thought they were gifts to cheer me up," she said. Now she was not exactly sure what the beads meant. The culture of dwarves was very different from her. “It's not it?”

 

"They accepted you to their family, Miss Whitley," he said after a moment of silence with a gentle smile. “Dori as daughter, Nori and Ori as brothers.”

 

“This gesture is extremely nice, but is that even possible? Since Dori adopted me as his daughter, shouldn't I be the nice of Nori and Ori?”

 

“Relationships in our tradition are different, _badgûna,_ “ His voice was low, subtle and Beatrice straightened up to hide the shiver passing through her. "But I'm surprised they did not want to tell you right away."

 

"I think they wanted to do it at the right moment." She take their side. “They did not want to overwhelm me after what happened yesterday. I won't hold it against them.”

 

Beatrice looked at the Ri brothers and discovered, that their eyes were fixed on her. She smiled, but her swollen eyes did not look that good. Still looking at them, she asked Thorin.

 

“How can I show them that I cherish the bond?”

 

“Grab the braids with metal beads and kiss them.”

 

Beatrice did as she was advised. She could swear that she had never seen the Ri brothers so overjoyed. They glittered so hard that she had to look away. Rivendell was beautiful. Full of trees and fountains. Beatrice absorbed the melancholy landscape and almost walked away, when she remembered what she had been aiming for. Earlier conversation sidetracked her.

 

"Mister Thorin," she turned to him and looked at him. She was affected, seeing that he was looking at her. "I'm afraid I'll be forced to travel with you for some more time. I'm not sure how much long, but I promise I will not be a trouble, I will help as much as I can. I can also pay.”

 

At this point, she began to pull off the earrings, but the Bag End situation was repeated. Thorin grabbed her wrist and denied with a move of his head. Beatrice did not understand why the dwarrow was refusing. She tilted her head to the side, and Thorin's hands grasped her much smaller ones. Beatrice felt how rough and full of scars they were. Nobleman shouldn't have such hands. The dwarrow had to work very hard, though he was a king.

 

"Balin, write a contract for Miss Whitley," he said in a loud voice, still looking at their hands. "We'll be escorting her for we're heading in the same direction."

 

"But the payment..." began Beatrice. She was looking at Balin, then at Thorin.

 

"As a payment..." Thorin said, uncertain about his next words.”Beatrice will wear my bead as a payment.”

 

Thorin broke away from her and started walking out of the room, followed by brothers Ri, shouting something in their tongue. They were not satisfied with Thorin's decision and the woman had no idea why. She sat down next to Balin, who was writing the contract. A moment before Thorin explained to her that getting a bead from someone was a family affair, and now the dwarves were surprised, happy, and upset.

 

She was afraid to admit to herself, that Thorin taking her to his family had hurt her. She had John, loved him and longed for him. But Thorin... Thorin attracted her like no other before, and her heart tumbled because of it. She sighed heavily.

 

“Could you explain to me why Mister Thorin's statement caused such an uproar, Mister Balin?”

 

"It's not my thing to tell, lass," he murmured. “You will have to talk about this with Thorin.”

 

Beatrice moaned and moved to her last spot. Easier said than done. She could have approached Thorin, but could that work? The dwarrow was stubborn and probably did not intend to share this information with her. Beatrice didn't want to sit here and wait for something that wouldn't come, so she got up and went to the elf, who was responsible for sewing her dress. She asked if she could make for her an attire for the journey in a dark colors.

 

She intended to mourn for her mother and explained it to the female elf, when she asked. She promised Beatrice, that the clothes would be ready in three days. She was still walking in the corridors of Rivendell for a couple of hours, trying to spend some time alone. She knew there was no time to cry. She had to find a way home. Then she will be able to truly mourn her mother's death. She returned to the dwarves at lunchtime.

 

She sat down next to Dori and Ori and before she could put the meat on the plate, Balin handed her a piece of paper and a pen with an inkwell.

 

“See if everything is right.”

 

Beatrice looked at him for a moment and then signed the contract.

 

“Why not read? " He was surprised.

 

“I trust you.”

 

 

 

_**He lives in you  
He lives in you*** _

 

_*** The Lion King 2 – He lives in you** _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> badgûna - dream-man
> 
> do you know some good Spideypool fics? i fell in love in that ship and i want to read more and more.


	9. Rainbow

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thorin is a softie, Kili is a teaser and Dori is a mother hen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i started uni this week, so chapter is shorter. i will try to post chapters every week even now.  
> enjoy! :)

_**I used to live in the darkness  
Dress in black, act so heartless*** _

 

 

 

They spent in Rivendell two weeks.

 

The first week was calm, filled with fun and songs. Beatrice had a great time playing with the dwarves. She laughed at their jokes, danced and sang with them. Once or twice, she helped Fili and Kili with pranks. Everything has changed on the eighth day. After learning that her mother was dead, Beatrice was unable to integrate with the dwarves as she had before. She was more quiet, smiled less. She almost always could be seen with Dori, sometimes with another of the Ri brothers. Between dinner and going to bed she went out for an hour and returned with red eyes and runny nose. Nobody said anything, but everyone knew what was going on.

 

Dori had taught her how to use sword during those few days, after breakfast, and before dinner. According to him, she had good foot movements. She moved nimble and easily remembered how to block the hit. She was a bit clumsy, but it looked better than her attempts to attack. The sword escaped from her grip, she stumbled, and it seemed to her that she just waved it like a stick.

 

Beatrice was awakened from nap by Nori. She thought it was tea time, but she was wrong. The dwarrow explained to her that they had to leave immediately and that she needed to hurry. Now, she could barely see the Rivendell buildings behind the trees. She looked behind only once, wishing she had time to say goodbye to the elves, who became he friends.

 

They didn't have ponies anymore, so they had to walk on foot. Although from what she understood, they would have to leave them, before climbing up, so it's even better. Sun was setting down slowly. Thorin ordered the camp to be made. Beatrice fell to the ground, barely able to stand on her feet. Exercises with Dori, muscle soreness and long wander exhausted her. She wanted to help with cooking or collecting wood, but she was not able to get up. Ori helped her sit under the tree, where she leaned against it. Beatrice almost fell asleep when warm material appeared on her body. She opened her eyes and saw the Thorin's back.

 

The woman reacted immediately. She leaned forward as much as she could and grabbed dwarrow's hand. He turned toward her, looking at her and then at their joined hands. Without stopping her hold on him, he crouched down near her knees and waited until she told what was going on.

 

“The bead. You were supposed to put it in my hair. As part of the contract,” she said quietly. She did not want the rest of the dwarves to react badly. “When and where do you want to do it?”

 

Thorin changed their position. He set her between his legs, just like a couple of weeks ago and took off the elastic bandage. He began to untangle one of the braids. Beatrice covered herself with Thorin's cloak and his legs. She asked why he could not just replace the wooden bead with one of his own. He told her that it would not sit well with their tradition.

 

“Why did Dori get angry when you set such condition?” she asked, playing with fur on his cloak. “I cannot belong to the Ri family and yours?”

 

"There is no counter to that," he replied after a moment. "But my beads are different. I should first ask for their permission.”

 

“That's why they were angry? Because you didn't ask?”

 

"You could say that," he murmured. “I will explain everything at the right time.”

 

"When you say such things, I feel like I am a child asking the parent, where the babies come from.”

 

Beatrice felt king's chest trembling in laughter. She relaxed. The dwarrow finished and showed her the result of his work. The braid was different from those made by Dori. It was not made of three bands, and of two. Even the bead was different. It looked like silver wearing a blue gem. The bead marks from the Ri brothers were red and had a different symbol. She decided to ask Ori about it later.

 

"Thank you," she said. “For the cloak and allowance to be with you on the quest. It means a lot to me.”

 

Thorin's arms embraced her and Beatrice felt her heart beat faster. She hid pink cheeks under the fur so that no one could see it.

 

"The pleasure was all mine, Miss Whitley.”

 

Beatrice closed her eyes, feeling blissful. Thorin's warmth and his soothing presence made her fall asleep. She leaned over Thorin, laying down to sleep in his arms. She realized what happened, when she heard whispers. Thorin talked about something with Balin and no one seemed happy. She rose abruptly, shocking them all. She waited until her senses came back, and then gave back the cloak to surprised dwarrow.

 

“I'm apologize for I fell asleep. You must have been very uncomfortable, Mister Thorin, "she stuttered.

 

She walked away leaving the king with hiss counselor and sit next to Fili and Kili, who entertained Bilbo.

 

“Did you sleep well?” Fili grinned, and Beatrice hit him in the shoulder with her fist.

 

"He gave you his bead," Kili said, inspecting it with his fingers. His eyes suddenly gleamed. ”We should give you ours too. In the end, you saved Fili and you are our auntie now.”

 

Beatrice groaned. She should have expected it. She fell asleep in Thorin's arms for second time and his nephews won't leave it alone. They will be joking because o it probably for a long time.

 

“Excellent idea!” cheered Fili and the brothers immediately changed wooden beads to theirs.

 

"You are part of our family now," Kili said.

 

“But you don't have mother's beads yet.”

 

“And this will be a difficult task. She is incredibly stubborn.”

 

“Your uncle is stubborn too, and somehow I succeeded.”

 

They grinned at her, and moments later Bofur came to give her bowl with food. She thanked and began to eat. Bofur didn't go away and looked at her long and hard. Beatrice raised her eyebrows.

 

"You look better in bright colors, lass," he said at last.

 

Beatrice put her hand on her heart and opened her mouth in a mock indignation.

 

“Are you suggesting that I look bad?” Bofur quickly denied, and Beatrice smiled sadly. “Black is the color of mourning in my culture. I will wear it for at least a year.”

 

"You have a lot of strange traditions," he commented.

 

“The pot calling the kettle black,” she laughed.

 

She ate the stew in peace and only when she unfolded the sleeping bag, she was pulled back into conversation.

 

“What was she like?” Kili asked. “Your mom.”

 

Beatrice did not have to wonder about this question long.

 

“Joyful, full of energy, and very feminine and elegant,” Beatrice took out photos of her family and showed them. “This is my mum. This man is my dad. At first glance he seems very strict, but has a very gentle heart. This is my sister. She keep her feet on the ground and is my total opposite. And it's ... It's John. My fiance.”

 

“Do you love him?” asked Fili.

 

Beatrice looked at the picture. Fili asked her a question she had asked herself before appearing in Middle Earth. She still did not even know the answer.

 

"Yes," she said finally.” But I don't know if I love him the same way, he loves me.”

 

{*}

 

They arrived at the foot of the mountain with the sunset. Balin and Dwalin had to explain to Thorin for half an hour that there was no point in climbing at night. Finally, he capitulated. He went somewhere and dealt with his affairs, probably brooding.

 

Beatrice walked away from them for a few yards into the woods and hid behind a tree to replace her menstrual pad. Her period have begun, and in her case the second day was the worst. The greatest bleeding was then, her back and stomach ached. She also had nausea, and attacks of vomiting.

 

And so it was now. She held the used pad in her hand, her stomach squeezed, and began to empty her stomach. She leaned against the tree trunk when she was done.

 

“Beatrice, where are you? Dori is looking for you!” she heard Nori, then he immediately appeared next to her. He looked at her vomit, at her, and then on the pad in her hand. “What is this? Why is there so much blood? Something happened to you? Dori! Oin! Beatrice is injured!”

 

“No, no! It's nothing like that! Really!” Her voice was drowned out by the murmur that had arisen.

 

Everyone came. All the company gathered around her. Dori stroked her head, and Oin examined her. He wanted to touch her stomach, but she stepped away and urged them to hear her out. They returned to the camp. Beatrice tucked the napkin into an empty package from tissues. She sat down by the fire.

 

“My period has begun, that's why I bleed. I vomited because the hormones are buzzing. Nothing happened,” she laughed, seeing their faces. Everyone was embarrassed. Beatrice was so amused that she decided to tease them. “The eggs were not inseminated, so they cracked. It will happen every twenty-eight days. Although it may now appear irregularly.”

 

Of course, the first to react was Ori.

 

“ _Every twenty-eight days_?” he seemed surprised. “So often? According to the writings, the dwarf-females bleed once every three months. They do not go through the same symptoms you do”

 

“Oh, how I would like that!” she moaned. Dori began to massage her back, and Beatrice immediately lean t his touch.

 

"That's enough, my dear," Dori said. “It's time to sleep.”

 

"Dori," she moaned.

 

“No, Beatrice, you're going to sleep.

 

“Is it because I'm a woman?”

 

"No," he said, comforting her. “That's because you're my daughter.”

 

.

 

_**Got back the stars in my eyes, too  
Yeah, now I see the magic inside of me*** _

 

_*** Kesha - Rainbow** _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> don't forget to comment! :) it would make my day ;)


	10. I feel everything

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> it's rains, beatrice is in love and thorin is clueless. as always.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i could post this chapter 3 weeks ago, but i wasn't motivated enough. oh well. i'm an attention whore kk. or a comment whore. i have three more chapters written and maybe i will post two of them next week. or maybe three at once. we will see if yo can persuade me. lol.
> 
> enjoy

Suddenly there was an explosion and light swept them all. Beatrice glanced toward the sound of her voice and saw Gandalf, who had persuaded them to fight. The sword reached Beatrice's hand, and she immediately repelled the enemy's attack, then began to run after Dorim calling her. The last thing the woman saw coming out of the throne room was the falling body of the Goblin King.

Gandalf led the corridor toward the exit and Beatrice was very happy to see the glare of the setting sun. The wizard started counting them and one person was missing. Beatrice looked around and looked at the faces of the dwarfs. Dwarves. There was Bilba. The company began to argue about who was responsible for his disappearance. Finally the leader spoke.

"I'll tell you what happened. Master Baggins saw his chance and he took it! He is thought of nothing but his soft bed and his warm heart since he stepped out of his door! We will not be seeing our Hobbit again. He is long gone. "

Beatrice approached him and was about to grab his arm when the hobbit appeared.

 "No, he is not."

She ran to him and hugged him, happy to have him all right. She let him go when the king demanded an answer.

"Look, I know you have me. And you're right, I often think of Bag End. I miss my books. And my armchair. And my garden. See, that's where I belong. That's home. And that's why I came back, cause you do not have one. A home. It was taken from you. I will help you take it back if I can. "

Now everything was going well. Thorin began to trust Bilb. Beatrice looked at the king and smiled. Everything went in the right direction.

 

_**I'm scared that I'm falling  
(Feeling everything)*** _

 

_***Cara Delevingle - I feel everything** _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> leave kudos and comments~


	11. I like me better

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The kiss happens.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> don't hate me for my errors, love me for the chapter kk
> 
> enjoy

__**Stay awhile stay awhile  
Stay here with me  
Lay here with me **

 

 

All was well.

 

Or at least she thought so before she heard a howl. It wasn't wolves, oh no. Beatrice knew it would be to beautiful to be true, if they continued they journey without any problems. Fear ran trough her body once again that day. Beatrice felt like a character in horror film. Firstly, you are introduced to the story, so it's calm, and then it gets more and more frightening. There are scenes that make you grab the arm of the person sitting next to you. Then it gets worse. They allow you to relax and then they attack. She felt the same way now. At first they almost lost Kili, then they were caught, and now they were chased by wargs.

 

"Out of the frying pan..."Thorin began, staring in horror at the impending threat.

 

"... and into the fire! Run! RUN! "Gandalf finished the sentence and the others listened to his advice.

 

The company began to ran down from the mountain as quickly as they could. They ran and ran between trees, and the sun was almost gone. Beatrice felt nauseous, seeing the end of the path. They had no way out. Behind them enemies, before them cliff. Beatrice looked horrified at Thorin. She was looking at him, wanting to tell him everything she felt. The mind knew that the king be all right, at least for now, though she was not sure about herself.

 

"Up to the trees, all of you! Come on, climb! Bilbo, climb! "exclaimed the wizard.

 

Beatrice followed his instruction and let Dwalin to boost her up to the branch. She grabbed it and began to climb, followed by Balin, Thorin and Bombur. Dozens of wargs surrounded the trees and began to jump wanting to reach them with their claws. The woman looked at the fangs of the enraged animals and pressed herself harder to the tree. She did not know how to escape from this situation, but she hoped that salvation would come soon.

 

Huge wolves jumped higher and higher, making the trees on which they stood wobble. Beatrice felt someone's presence behind her. She turned her head and seeing Thorin she turned away quickly, not wanting him to see her face right now. He pressed onto her back, his hands on both sides of her head. He whispered in her ear that everything would be fine. Beatrice sighed. Thorin's words were soothing, but reality did not imply their truth. She heard Thorin gasped and then he spoke the name she did not expect to hear so early.

 

She turned to look to the same direction Thorin did. A huge, white ork was riding an equally bright warg. He spoke in an unknown for Beatrice language, but it did not sound nice. Beatrice doubted that anything in this language would be pleasant. After the words of orc, the wargs became even more aggressive. They jumped higher and higher, their jaws cracking branches in attempts to get to them.

 

From the constant pressure of the animals, the tree was torn from the ground and fell on the next. It looked like a domino. First tree hit the second, second one hit the third, and so on, and so on. The dwarves and Beatrice had no other way but jump from one fallen tree to another. Finally they reached the last tree. It didn't collapse yet, but it was only matter of time. Beatrice looked down. Deep darkness scared her, so she turned to look at the company. She counted them and saw that everyone was present and that calmed her down a little bit.

 

Beatrice heard Gandalf cry out to Fili and saw him throwing a burning pine cone into the warg. She also got a few and each of them she shoved at the animals, hoping their fur would be set on fire. She felt bad, having such wishes, but she knew there was no other way. They will die, or her friends. There was no in between.

 

Not everyone was so lucky and accurate. Some failed and the area around them stood on fire, forcing the creatures to retreat. Azog let out a roar of anger and the dwarves around her cheered. Joy didn't last long. The tree was unable to withstand and began to bend towards the abyss until it finally hung, supported only by a pair of roots. Beatrice pulled up on the branch and sat down on it. She looked around and the cry sank in her throat when she saw Ori falling. He managed to catch Dori by the leg, but he could not hold the extra weight and branch slipped from his fingers. Gandalf saved them by drawing his staff so they could catch it.

 

The rough hands covered her face, turning her toward him. Thorin put his sweaty forehead over her, his eyes wide open as if to memorize every part of her, every shape, every color. His dry lips touched hers. He didn't deepen the kiss, but stepped away.

 

“ _Amralizi, lanselê_ ," he said softly, gently.

 

Beatrice did not know what the words meant, but she knew the look he had given her, knew the tone of his voice. This could mean one thing. She opened her mouth to say _Je t'aime_ , but Thorin was no longer there. He walked slowly toward the enemy. Beatrice remembered that scene from the film. She said he looked majestic among the flames, walking alone toward his nemesis to save his friends. She also said that he was a fool for thinking, that what he was doing was a good solution.

 

“Thorin, come back here!” she shouted, her voice trembling. “You cannot just kiss people and then just die! Come back here, you stupid dwarf!”

 

She made an annoyed wail, when he did not reply, did _not_ turn and did _not_ even look at her. The dwarrow began to run, sword and oak shield in his hands. Azog cried a battle warning, and then his warg thumped at Thorin. The beast knocked down the dwarrow. Beatrice entered the main part of the tree, repeating _no, no, no_.

 

The dwarrow stood up, panting. Orc turned and charged again at Thorin. He waved his cudgel and hit the dwarrow before he could react. Beatrice's cry was mixed with Balin's one and Thorin's fall. Beatrice got up and started walking.

 

"No, Beatrice, you cannot," Balin said. "Thorin would never forgive me if something happened to you.”

 

"He won't have anything to forgive if he's dead," she snapped. “And I do _not_ need your permission.”

 

She went on, her movement faster. White warg bit Thorin's forearm and the woman started running. She hid behind the burning trees so that she wouldn't be seen and tried to sneak up and attack orc from behind. But she needed time, which was running out too quickly. Azog's minion went to Thorin and his ax was close to Thorin's neck as Bilbo showed up. Beatrice covered her mouth with a hand not to make an unnecessary sound. Hobbit managed to kill the orc, who hasn't expected anything and then stood in a defensive position near the unconscious Thorin.

 

Beatrice had already come out of hiding to attack orcs, who were close to Bilbo, but Dwalin, Fili and Kili outran her. The woman began to run, her sword drawn. The wargs surrounded dwarves. She used one lapse in orc's concentration and lam out into him. She jumped, bounced on warg's behind and stabbed orc in the neck with her sword. She pulled it put to jab him once more, this time aiming for spot between his lungs. The blade was already going through in Azog's back when he grabbed her by the neck and threw her. Her body hit the tree.

 

The last thing she saw was the huge bird that took Thorin's in his claws.

 

 

 

 

_**I like me better when i’m with you*** _

 

_***Lauv – I like me better** _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> leave kudos and comments. i will give you cookies


	12. Orpheus and Eurydice

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> shit happens

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> many errors, don't care, head hurts, love me please

_**Only her love warmed him, humanized him.  
When he was with her, he thought differently about himself. *** _

 

 

A huge eagle laid the figure of the dwarrow king on the flat top of the mountain.

 

The dwarves gathered around him, but he was still unconscious. Gandalf spoke to him, but he did not answer. The wizard leaned forward and began to whisper the spell. Thorin took a deep breath and opened his eyes, sitting up/

 

"The halfling?" he asked. The last thing he remembered was Baggins shielding his body from Azog.

 

"It's all right. Bilbo is here. He's quiet safe. "

 

Dwalin and Kili helped Thorin to get up. As soon as he stood, he went away from them, not wanting to show weakness. He was the leader. He was supposed to be their strength, the one who pushed them forward. Thorin looked at the hobbit.

 

"You! What were you doing? You nearly got yourself killed! Did not say that you would be a burden?” Thorin advances until he is face to face with Bilbo, who looks frightened. "I've never been so wrong in all my life!"

 

Thorin grabs Bilbo and embraces him. The other dwarves cheer loudly and slap each other on the back. Gandalf smiles. Bilbo, looking quite surprised, hugs Thorin back.

 

"I am sorry I doubted you."

 

"Well, I would have doubted me too. I'm not a hero or a warrior... not even a burglar." he said, and they laughed.

 

Thorin looked at the faces of all his companions. Dwalin stood near him and looked as if he was relieved. His king was alive, he didn't fail. Balin stood beside him and though everything seemed to end well, he did not smile. He was probably still stunned by what had happened. His nephews had fear in their eyes, but the fact that their uncle was alive and well, that he had not disappeared, came to them slowly. Gloin held his brother, making sure he won't approach the king. Oin wanted to examine the leader as soon as possible, though he knew he had to wait until Thorin asked for it.

 

Bofur and Bombur were grinning, and Bifur looked away, glancing in the direction from where they had just escaped. Dori, Nori and Ori created a small circle, separating themselves from the rest. They were discussing something serious, completely ignoring the company. The wizard and the hobbit whispered among themselves. Thorin did not see the face he wanted to see, and panic crept into his mind. He did not want to let himself think that Beatrice could be gone.

 

“Where is she? Where is Beatrice?” he asked, looking around, but he didn't see the petite woman anywhere.

 

Some dwarves began to look around, wanting to point out hers location. Balin, Bifur and brothers Ri looked straight at him. When the women weren't found, there was silence. They tried to remember when they last saw her. None of them saw the eagle take it. Balin finally spoke.

 

“She followed you. When you went to fight Azog, she went after you.”

 

“She jumped on the white warg, bounced off of him, and stabbed the Defiler." informed them Bifur in language of dwarves. “I did not see what happen later. The bird took me.”

 

Thorin moved abruptly, ready to climb down and go on the search for Beatrice. The pain in his chest blocked him. He stopped and put his hand on the blood-soaked shirt. He was turned to the company with his back, but they knew what was going on. Oin could not stand it and walked over to the king to medicate him, knowing he was too stubborn to ask for help.

 

He started to act. He ordered him to sit on the rock, take off his coat and shirt. He cleansed the wound and then began to apply herbal remedies to the wound. He was bandaging the king when Dwalin and Balin came closer to them.

 

"We cannot return, Thorin," Balin said. "Time is running out, food too, and a long way is still ahead of us.”

 

“She couldn't have survived it. Not with Azog.” Dwalin added, putting his hand on his king's shoulder. “I'm sorry.”

 

Thorin got dressed and began to walk down the cliff. Dwalin stopped him by grabbing his arm. They stood motionless. There was a lot of thought in the mind of the king. He knew that they wanted the best for him, but he could not bear the agony of knowing that he had lost her before he even had her. When he decided to fight against Azog, he knew there was a probability of failure, he knew that he might never see her again. But then _he_ would be dead.

 

He knew they were right. Beatrice was strong, but she would not survive a fight with Azog. Orc killed her, and the fire swallowed her body. Just like many years ago in Erebor. Fire seemed to take away everything that he cared for. If he could, he would cry over her loss. However, he could not allow himself to do so, not now. Not when he's on an expedition to restore his home.

 

"We have to move on," he finally said, and his heart burst into pieces. “We do not have time to lose.”

 

There were murmurs. The company was divided into camps. Balin, Dwalin, Oin, and Gloin – and Thorin even dared to say Gandalf - were in favor of his decision. Bombur and Bofur looked like they did not know what to think. They realized that she was gone, but they still had doubts. Dori, Nori, Ori, Bifur, the halfling and his nephews still believed she was safe and sound. If they made a democratic decision, Thorin would have to send two dwarves to check on the state of affairs. But he was the leader, the king. His decision was the most important. And he made it.

 

"Uncle, but Beatrice..." Fili began.

 

“She's dead, Fili!” he snapped. Fili shuddered and Thorin immediately softened. He repeated once more, quieter, more gentle. Helplessly. “She is dead.”

 

Now when he said it aloud, it came to him. Beatrice was truly gone. He will never see again her smiles, he won't hear her singing, he will _not_ put his fingers in her hair, his lips won't touch her. He will never tell her that he loves her. He will _not_ be able to cherish her as she deserves. He will _not_ show her Erebor, she will _not_ be jeweled, he will _not_ be her husband, her king.

 

She will _not_ wear dresses that he would buy her. She won't be upset. She will not look at him with those big eyes. She will _not_ become his queen - though she was already in his heart - and will never say what she feels for him. She won't ever be his.

 

Thorin turned so quickly that no one could see the tears in his eyes. He took a deep breath, and as he exhaled, he began to go down from the mountain. He had a long journey ahead of him, so he could not afford to be weak.

 

 

 

_**But there was a fragrant scent of herbs, the low humming of bees,  
And he fell asleep with his cheek on the sun-warmed earth. *** _

 

 

_*** Czesław Miłosz – Orpheus and Eurydice** _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> show me some love in comments and kudos and maybe i will post one more chapter this week


	13. Supergirl

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> bea is found

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im in a good mood so im posting it

_**And then she'd say, that nothing can go wrong,  
When you're in love, what can go wrong?** _

 

 

Beatrice woke up the snarls, screams and the crack of the branches.

 

The woman moaned as her body rose and hit something. It was problematic for her to breathe, her head aching unkindly. With difficulty, she opened her eyes. It was too light, at least for her. It was a migraine. In the movement she managed to capture the crowns of trees, and when her eyes became accustomed to the action, she saw a disgusting pale face.

 

They stopped, and Azog began to look around and sniff the air. Beatrice did not move in fear of his reaction. She tried to breathe evenly, in spite of the difficulties it had caused her. She was sure that her ribs, that had just healed, were again broken. She was battered.

 

She tried to calm down, not to panic, but the longer she thought about it, the worse ending she saw. In each of these stories, she died. Cruelly, in pain. She closed her eyes when she saw Azog leaning his head down. For a moment, she thought she was fooling him, but his huge hand clamped on her neck. He picked her up, and she felt his breath on her cheek. She barely refrained from vomiting from this stink. She tightened her eyelids harder.

 

"I feel your fear," he said in broken English. “I would feel it even miles away. It makes my people excited, you know? When I catch the dwarves, I'll force them to look at how my orcs rape and beat you. Then I'll throw you to my wargs to eat.”

 

Beatrice whimpered involuntarily. She opened her eyes and it was a mistake. The face of the orc was too close and made the nausea come back. She could feel the tears on her cheeks. Azog's fingers pressed against her neck, cutting off her access to oxygen. Beatrice began to jolt. She kicked him and then she dig her nails into his arm. He let her go, and she started coughing. To the list of injuries she could add grey-blue marks on her neck and broken nails.

 

Azog said something to other orcs, and then they moved again. Beatrice snuggled into warm fur of the white warg and breathed deeply. She had to come up with a plan of escape, but her head refused to obey. Sweat ran down her body and she felt that she had a fever.

 

Suddenly, something struck one of Azog's subordinates. Beatrice took advantage of the confusion and pushed herself away from the animal to fall to the ground. She crawled to the bushes, trying not to be noticed by anyone. The orcs fled, but what attacked them, but the creature stayed. Beatrice held her breath as the black being drew closer to her. When the huge head was near her, she fainted.

 

 

{*}

 

She woke up feeling better than last time.

 

She was warm, she was breathing easier and her head was not aching. She felt as if she was lying on the cloud. Soft just like butter cloud. She could spend eternity here. She nestled into it more. She heard a low laugh and immediately rocked up, opening her eyes. She lay on three sheep in the open air. The sun was shining, the sky was clear. She looked at the man who had just laughed.

 

He was gigantic! He wasn't wearing a shirt and was holding an ax in his hand. His appearance suggested that he was dangerous, but the way he caressed cats and dogs that sat next to him made her calmer. She got up on her elbows, but the man stopped her. He handed her a cup that was half full and then covered her with a blanket.

 

"Drink," he said, returning to work. "I medicated your wounds, but for a few days you will not be able to make violent movements. I'm Beorn.”

 

“Thank you. My name is Beatrice, "she said, then took a sip. It was a warm milk with honey. "You've done a lot for me, but I cannot stay. I have to find my friends.”

 

"When you get better, I'll help you," he replied. “Now sleep.”

 

Beatrice did not want to do what he ordered, but the dream took over her once again. Her snooze was stirred by conversation. She rubbed her eyes and sat up, yawning. She was hungry, she wanted to sleep more, everything hurt, and now someone was waking her up. She fell asleep when the woodcut rhythm became even. The man stood and looked with an anger at some spot. She blinked several times when she saw Gandalf and Bilbo. The man raised the ax up and Beatrice's muscles tightened. She got up quickly and cried.

 

“No! Beorn, no!” she started walking towards them as fast as she could. “These are my friends. Don't hurt them, please.”

 

She could see their eyes on her, could heard them gasping, and some of dwarves would say her name. She turned her head to give them an appeasing smile. She was now able to see how the Ri brothers, Fili and Kili ran towards her. However, they did not reach her. Beorn grabbed her and laid her on his right shoulder. Beatrice latched on to the man's head immediately, afraid of falling.

 

While reading the Hobbit, Beorn was probably the only character she really liked. Not mentioning the dragon, of course. At first sight he was harsh but he had a good heart. Therefore, she was sure that he would accept them and that they were safe with him here. Not because it was like that in the book, no. Although, the main reason for her sympathy for him was that he turned into a bear.

 

She looked with a slight amusement in the eyes of the dwarves. They thought she was in danger and wanted to help her, but they were not sure how to do so. Apparently, they knew he was skin changer.

 

"It's all right," she said, as the Ri brothers began to jog toward them with clenched fists.”He won't hurt me.”

 

“How can you be so sure?!” Dori shouted, his voice filled with fear. “He uses black magic!”

 

She laughed.

 

“It's not magic, Dori. He's just like that,”she calmed him down. “I know it because I'm still alive. Azog took me with me. I lost consciousness and when I woke up... Beorn saved me.”

 

She left out some details from her time with the orc. She did not want to worry them unnecessarily. They will fuss over her because of her wounds and that was enough. She patted the man on his head and ordered him to put her on the ground, so she could greet her dwarves. Her bare feet touched the grass and she was immediately pulled in Dori's shoulders. She groaned in pain, but did not move away. She allowed Dori, Nori and Ori to embrace her one by one. Later, Fili and Kili threw themselves at her until she couldn't breath because of that pressure. Everyone from the company greeted her. Some of them were less surprised to see her alive than others. In the end, only Dwalin, Balin and Thorin were left unspoken to.

 

"Igot to hand it to you, lass," said Balin. "I didn't think I'd see you again, Miss Whitley. Especially not after Bifur told us that you attacked the Defiler.

 

"I doubted myself too," she admitted. "But I'm here now. The past is in the past. Now you have to focus on the journey. The story will be told some time later.”

 

"We have it plenty here," Dwalin muttered. “You will fill us in tonight.”

 

Beatrice raised her eyebrows up, not believing in what the warrior was saying. She tried not to think about them abandoning her again. She wanted to give them good reasons for doing it, really. They were far away, pale orc was still chasing them, but... Tears rose in her eyes. She clenched her jaw and stood up.

 

"I do not think so, Mister Dwalin," she snapped. "If I do _not_ want to talk about something, I _won't_.”

 

"You are part of a company. You signed a contract that obliges you to share important information.”

 

"That's true, Mister Balin. I signed the contract, but part of it was also your escort, that is also making sure I will stay _un_ dead. You left me there, you did _not_ come back for me, so you did _not_ fill your part of the contract, which makes it broken.”

 

“We were escaping, _missy_. The forest was full of orcs, and you wanted us to come back?”

 

"Yes," she said, her voice shaking.“I wanted someone to come back. But it doesn't matter now, we ended up in the same place. From what I understood you thought I was dead. Stay at this stage, for it will be the best.”

 

She removed the bead that was part of the deal and handed it to Balin. She wasn't able to look at Thorin. Not after what happened on the rock. Not after the kiss. It was too painful to give up. She turned and returned to her place nest to sheep.

 

{*}

 

They came home with Beorn when it was time for dinner.

 

The man put her on the back of a huge dog, and he began to lay cheeses, bread and honey on the table. At the very end, he set up a jug of milk and then sat down at the table, putting her on his lap. Beatrice whined that she was not a child and he would not have to sit with her, but Beorn grabbed her only harder and asked her not to wriggle. Beatrice pouted, but sat still.

 

“Hush, little bee. If you were sitting alone in a chair, you would not have eaten.”

 

He gave her bread and honey, and poured milk into the her cup. Beatrice began to eat. She enjoyed the sweet taste and listened to the conversation.

 

"There are others like you?" asked Bilbo.

 

"Once, there were many."

 

"And now?"

 

"Now, there is only one."

 

Beatrice grasped the man's thumb to comfort him. How very lonely he had to be, the last of his kind. She held his finger for the rest of the evening. When she had a full stomach, she lay down on his lap. The man emitted so much heat and was so comfortable, Beatrice became sleepy. She could barely keep her eyes open, but she saw how several dwarves still watched her for one reason or another.

 

"You need to reach the mountain before the last days of autumn?" Beorn asked, his big hands began to stroking her hair like she was a cat, playing with her hair, massaging her shoulders and feet.

 

"Before Durin's Day falls, yes." The wizard replied, looking at them intently.

 

"You are running out of time."

 

"Which is why we go through Mirkwood."

 

Beatrice took a deep breath. When the skin changer stopped petting her temples, she opened her eyes and the first thing she saw was Ri brothers observing her. Ori looked away quickly, Nori looked furious, and Dori was upset and sad. She smiled at them lazily, letting them know that she was feeling good and that she was not angry at them.

 

She had some trouble with Dwalin and Balin, but now there was no return to what has been. Agreements must be kept. She will stay with Beorn for a while, and then she will go alone to find her way home. She sent smiles to the king's nephews and to Bilbo too. When her eyes met Thorin's, the smile disappeared, but she didn't look away. She wanted to show him that she understood why they had made such a decision, and why they hadn't came back. The dwarrow's face remained unmoved. Beatrice grimaced in a crooked smile and hid her face in the man's shirt.

 

"These lands are crawling with  o rcs. Their numbers are growing, and you are on foot. You will never reach the forest alive." Beorn  said and Beatrice shuddered, hearing his tone and what he was saying.

 

She clenched her hand on the nightgown that the man had dressed  her . Tho r in looked shocked. Beorn stood up, holding her in his arms like a child. He stood  across of the dwarrow .

 

"I do not like dwarves. They're greedy and blind, blind to the lives of those they deem lesser than their own,” he was saying and his hands were clenched tight on her. Beorn cough the mouse from the table and gave it to the woman. Beatrice held her cautiously, not wanting to squeeze her too hard. "But Orcs I hate more. I will give you all you need. "

 

The man put her on a hay, close to dogs and cats. Beatrice was n't drowsy , but she put her head on the dog's belly, watching Beorn go to h is room. She scratched the  animal under  its chin and after a moment, Dori s at beside her. In his hand was a comb. Beatrice turned her back to him, took off the eraser, and allowed Dori  braid her hair once more .

 

“You said  that  this man... took care of your wounds. Is everythi ng all right ?  Does something hurt you? ” he asked.

 

She  shook her head .

 

"I'm a bit b ruised , but it's going to  be fine very soon .”

 

Dori stayed quiet, finishing her plaits putting them into a ponytail. Beatrice frowned and grabbed the braid, which was still loose. She handed it to the dwarrow, but he shook his head. She looked at the strand and after the style it was made of, she knew that it was Thorin who made it. It became loose because of missing bead. She opened her mouth to ask if it was a tradition that did not allow him to braid it, but Bofur beat her to it.

 

“This braid and bead  are like ring from your fiance.”

 

She blinked several times. She looked around, but the dwar row was not in the room.

 

"He  proposed to me?!  H e knew I ha ve a fiance...”

 

"You  proposed, not him ," Nori laughed. "In Bag End, when you offered him your earrings. As for your fianc e , it is complicated. We told you how dwar ves pair up , right?”

 

Beatrice concentrated on recalling the conversation from a few weeks ago. Her eyes widened as she looked at Nori. She was Thorin's One.

 

 

 

_**And then she'd say: It's all right, I got home late last night  
But I'm a Supergirl and Supergirls just fly.*** _

 

_*** Reamonn - Supergirl** _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> love me


	14. Bitch

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> nothing happens, little filer, not very much of thorin, sorry not sorry

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tattoos stories in order they appeared:  
> peter pan  
> tim burton's corpse bride  
> beauty and the beast  
> spirted away  
> the lion king  
> harry potter

__**I'm a bitch, I'm a lover  
I'm a child, I'm a mother  
I'm a sinner, I'm a saint  
I do not feel ashamed*  
**

 

Beatrice did not sleep that night.

 

She thought over everything that had happened. She was in Bag End few weeks ago, calmly acclimatising. Later she lived in harmony with all the dwarves, and now she barely spoke with any of them. But it wasn't her or their fault. It was not anyone's fault. She had the right to feel confused and uncertain about the relationship she had with them. So they had the right to leave her there. They thought she was dead, that Azog killed her. They were also chased, they had to run. But she couldn't get rid of the bitter taste of the disappointment. She understood the rest of the dwarves, the wizard, and Bilbo. But Dori, Nori and Ori? Didn't they take her to their family?

 

And here came what they said a few days ago. They wanted to return to find her, but the contract obliged them to do the king's instructions. So she had no right to be angry with them. Thorin was another matter. She thought... she thought, he felt something. This kiss and his words. She didn't know their meaning, but she knew they were important. Why did he decide not to came back for her?

 

Two feelings struck her. Anger and satisfaction. She was angry at herself and on them for her hope. A small part of her was happy that they didn't risk anything for her. It was so ironic and absurd that Beatrice decided to blame it on hormones.

 

Beatrice folded her clothes and put them on a stool. Beorn brought her a tub - for him it was a big bowl - to a separate room for her to wash. He left her a large piece of cloth to serve as a towel, poured hot water into a bowl and left. The woman came into the water when it cooled a little, not wanting to burn her skin. She grabbed the soap and started washing the dirt and sweat from her body and hair. When it was over, the liquid was lightly brown, and she smelled freshly.

 

Suddenly she got hot, could not catch her breath and her head was. She fainted. When she woke up, something as grinding in her thigh and the middle of her back. The water was still warm, so it couldn't laid here very long. She opened her eyes and stood up. The room was the same, but it seemed different. Something's changed in it and she was not sure what was it.

 

She realized what occurred, after looking at the table. She was taller. She had no idea how it happened, but she was a few centimeters taller than usual. She looked at her clothes and knew they wouldn't fit her. She walked over to the door, leaving behind the wet footprints, bent over and started calling Dori. For a long time no one came until finally, someone who was not expected, showed up.

 

She stared through the crack of the door at the dwarrow. She was used to looking at him from a different angle, and now she could look at him from above. Beatrice cleared her throat, letting him know, she knew he was there.

 

"Dori went out with Nori and Ori to look around," he said. “Do you need something?”

 

"Yes, I do" she said, still not allowing him to see her. “Could you ask Beorn for a shirt, pants and a belt? But they has to be his, okay?”

 

"As you wish, Miss Whitley," he said in a voice hollow.

 

Beatrice bit her lower lip, hearing his tone. She knew they would have to talk about what had happened, what _was_ happening. She wiped her body dry, and the towel wrapped around her head, forming a turban on her hair. Thorin's braid was almost undone, and Beatrice - due to the dwarves's tradition - had no heart to destroy it.

 

There was a knock on the door, and Beatrice almost invited someone inside. She asked fr the clothes to be handed to her and when she took them, she discovered that Kili was sent to do so. She thanked him and started dressing. The dwarrow was still behind the door and tried to find out for what she needed those huge clothes.

 

Beatrice put on the trousers, which she had girdled with a strap and discovered she had grown a little too much. The trousers reached her heels, and they should be much, much longer. The sleeves of the shirt were the same. They reached her fingers. She took the towel and threw it into the bowl and opened the door. Kili looked at her, blinked several times, then screamed. Beatrice narrowed her eyes, the sound so loud and unpleasant for the ear. Kili's scream summoned other dwarves and they reacted similarly. Some eyes widened, others opened their mouths in a disbelief. Beatrice tilted her head to the side and began to count how much shorter they were.

 

It was only when Beorn and Gandalf came, she understood how tall she was. She was shorter than a skin changer, but taller than the wizard, which meant she was about two meters tall. She was far too tall, but certainly it was better than when looked like eight years old girl. Beatrice get pass the dwarves and went out. She rolled up sleeves of her shirt and trousers, then began to practice.

 

She arranged herself in a boxer's positions and started punching, then kicking the air. In this form, she would be able to knock wargs with her fist. For months, she didn't train, and she kept the form only thanks to their constant journey. In Rivendell, she didn't think much about it, and later she practiced how to use the sword. Her body and she felt great. Beatrice felt strong, confident, beautiful, and it was all for the change of growth.

 

After an hour of training, she realized that all dwarves, wizard, hobbit and Beorn watched her. She walked up to them with a million watt smile on her lips. Energy flown through her and she swore that she would be able to be active for a few more hours. Beatrice raised her hands up to stretch.

 

“Can I keep you?” Beorn asked with a Cheshire cat smile. Beatrice laughed . "You would patrol with me, little bee."

 

"Not _a little bee_ ," she pointed at him with her finger to scare him. "And if it is bee, then it will be _queen_. And certainly not small.”

 

“Queen bee, hmm?” he grinned.

 

They heard a snarl. Beatrice glanced down at the dwarves, then crouched down to hit her forehead against Dori's forehead. She wanted to show him her sympathy. He returned the gesture, then Beatrice jumped up.

 

"I have so much energy that I could ride someone," she murmured, stretching once more, until something in her bones cracked.

 

“Ride someone...?” Ori repeated hesitantly.

 

"Having sex, while being on top," she responded vaguely, not paying attention to Nori's pleading eyes. “After intense exercises I become... greedy.”

 

Ori's face turned red. Beatrice sat down between them, sweat running down over her neck. She undone a few buttons of her shirt. She looked at her hands and thought she might do a tattoo on them. Fili sat down on her left, Kili on her right. They stared at her tattoos carefully and how she tucked her trousers up to her knees.

 

"To tell you the truth, I didn't believe you could do such things with the body," Fili admitted. “But looking at you now, I know I was wrong. You are full of surprises, Miss Whitley.”

 

“You think so?” Beatrice was amused. She put her elbows on her knees. “I'm not surprised. My previous... form didn't make me feel good and confident. It didn't look good when I was practicing. Nothing spectacular.”

 

"You never showed us that, so we have no opinion on that." Kili smiled. “You said _the previous form_. How many do you have?”

 

"Apparently three," she calculated. “My original is between this form and Dwalin's high. The one you are used and this one.”

 

“What did you learn in Rivenell?” Gandalf interrupted, standing over her. “What did Lady Galadriel tell you?”

 

"That I have to follow the dwarves and I'll pay a high price for going home," she told him.

 

She tried to forget what she had seen in the pond in Rivendell. The less she thought, the better she functioned. She could _not_ afford a nervous breakdown. Not now. She was so close to exploding, though what she was doing now was intended to divert her attention from the unpleasant situation. Gandalf nodded and disappeared into the garden. Beatrice jerked, feeling a soft touch on her calf. Ori touched her leg, curious as to what her tattoos looked like.

 

"They are characters from tales for children," she said, and the youngest dwarves looked at her interested. “The right leg is a story about a boy, who never wanted to grow up. Here are the stars that set the route to his island. Here are his friend and enemies and he.”

 

"You have to tell us this story sometime," Kili was enthusiastic. “Maybe even today! But first tell about other tattoos.”

 

Beatrice raised her eyebrows amused. Other dwarves also sat down to listen to her stories.

 

“Left leg is a story about a dead woman, who wanted to marry a living man. Here are her friends and she, the man she wanted to marry and his beloved and the blue butterflies she changed into,” she pointed. “On the right hand is the story of women, who fell in love with the beast. She is here, he there, and here is the rose, which symbolized the passing time. Left is the story of a girl, whose parents have turned into pigs and she wants to save them. She, the bird and the hamster, her friends and the boy, who helped her.

 

“She didn't want to mention that he also took the form of a dragon.

 

“And the neckline?” Fili asked.

 

“There are two stories. One about the lion, who lost his father and about the boy, who became an orphan but discovered magic in himself.”

 

"At last I know what they are about," Kili grinned.

 

“Maybe now you will stop staring at my breasts.”

 

 

{*}

 

 

When Beatrice woke up the other day, she was small again.

 

She climbed out of the huge bed Beorn had given her. She put off the large shirt and dressed in her black clothes. She didn't understand what was happening, but she preferred not to question it. If she did, she would go crazy. She went out to the kitchen, when she heard unidentified sounds. She turned and looked at the haystacks and saw Bofur laying over Bilbo. The dwarrow kissed his neck, the hobbit groaned and stopped only, when Bofur stuck tongue into his mouth. Beatrice withdrew and with a gentle smile on her face, she left.

 

The woman climbed into the chair, took the bread, put the cottage cheese on it, and poured honey on it. She hummed and drank Dori's tea. When she finished her meal, Beorn entered the room and immediately sat her on his laps. Beatrice from habit didn't react.

 

“You shifted your size, little queen bee.”

 

Beatrice shrugged.

 

“I don't have the explanation. What have to happened, happens,” she said. “Although I will miss you two meters high.”

 

“After breakfast we can duel. You and me.”

 

"It was nice to know you, Mister Dwalin," she sent him a smirk. "But first I'll have to talk to somebody.”

 

She glanced at Thorin. Moments later came happy Bofur and flushed Bilbo. Gloin threw a bag of money to Nori. Beatrice took part in the bet. She bet that in two weeks, the hobbit would wear the dwarrow's bead.

 

 

 

__**I'm your hell, I'm your dream  
I'm nothing in between  
You know you wouldn't want it any other way***

 

_*** Meredith Brooks - Bitch** _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> love me. give me comments and kudos and i will give you cookies


	15. All of me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> fluff things happend

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i wanted to post this on monday, few days ago, but i had exams so i couldn't. sorry

__**My head’s under water  
But I’m breathing fine  
You’re crazy and I’m out of my mind ***

 

 

The stars glowed brightly in the dark sky.

 

She spent the day trying to catch Thorin, however, he was always slipping away. Finally, she gave up and left with her brothers Ri to the meadow to polish her sword skills. However, only two hours out of five she spent on training. For the next hundred and eighty minutes Beatrice ran with the dogs, Ori sketched in his journal, Dori smoked the pipe, and Nori laid with the cat on the tree. When Beatrice got tired, she put her face on the eldest of Ri's brothers lap and fell asleep.

 

Her nap ended, when Bofur laughed. Dori tried to silence him, but it was too late. Beatrice opened her eyes. Bilbo, Bofur, Dwalin and Bifur sat around them. The woman rose and rubbed her eyes.

 

"At last," said Dwalin. “We had appointment a spar, remember?”

 

Beatrice got up, stretched, and stepped out. Dwalin came to her a moment later. She arranged her body in the proper fighting position. She feared that the dwarrow would not take her seriously for her gender and size, though Dwalin didn't disappoint her. She told him that they were allowed not only to punch, but also to kick. The first blow came from Beatrice. Dwalin dodged it, but he didn't expect Beatrice to lead the attack at such a fast pace. The woman's feet landed on the dwarrow's face. It was not a hit, that would make a bruise in a few hours, but it was strong enough for Dwalin to feel it.

 

The fight ended with a draw. Dwalin admitted, that the woman actually had some skills, and that Beatrice could move a little. After dinner, she found herself on the stairs to Beorn's house, wondering if she should talk to Thorin, who was sitting a few meters away from her on the stool.

 

A few hours ago, she was looking for such an opportunity, and now she was not sure she was ready. She didn't know how to start the conversation, what to say. She felt hand on her shoulder. Dwalin didn't look at her, but at the king.

 

"He wanted to come back for you," he said. "But Balin and I advised him differently. We had to think rationally...”

 

"Mister Dwalin," she interrupted. “I know. It's not the matter that haunts my mind.”

 

"You were able to bring Nori to me, and you cannot handle your dilemma?"

 

"It's easy to give advice to others, but following them is… challenging," she sighed.

 

Dwalin pushed her forward and nodded, encouraging her to act, Beatrice reignited over her stress and stepped to the dwarrow on her shaky legs. She sat cross-legged in front of him, the dwarrow's belly was on the line of her eyes. She looked at him, her mouth clenched into a thin line. Plenty of thought ran through her mind, but she chose the worst of them.

 

"The plait must be redone," she said, pointing at the loose strand of her hair.

 

She pushed forward and knelt, so he had good access to her hair. He stared at her for a long time, but after a moment he handed her a pipe that he held in his hand, and began to make a braid without a comment. Beatrice put her forearms on his knees so that they were parallel. She cleared her throat, the silence became awkward.

 

“So I proposed to you. Then, in the Bag End. With my earrings.”

 

“Yes.”

 

“And you accepted.”

 

“Yes.”

 

“Although you knew I had a...”

 

"Yes," he said.

 

Thorin kept repeating 'yes', even though Beatrice didn't ask questions, she presented the facts. She clenched her fingers on his lap, her heart beating harder. Since he could have been exposed to her, since he could show her his heart, she could do that too.

 

“Before goblins captured us, I decided to take off the ring. I wanted to give it to you, so you wold know, that I do _not_ want to be John's wife that I want to... "she stammered. Thorin finished and put on his bead. "I have feeling for you, Thorin Oakenshield.”

 

It was the most ridiculous confession of love in her life. She could say so many things, and she decided to use this formulation. Beatrice bit her lower lip and stared at the dwarrow's beard. She began to breathe rapidly, she swallowed loudly. She relaxed, only when a rough hand touched her cheek. She raised her gaze. Thorin's blue eyes were warm, full of affection and adoration. Beatrice put her hand on his, the other wrapped in his hair. The dwarrow leaned forward and the woman thought he would kiss her, but he bumped his forehead with hers.

 

After a few seconds, Thorin snatched her and sat her down on his lap. Her legs hung on the right, her head huddled between the shoulder and the dwarrow's arm. His chest was hard, but still comfortable and Beatrice wanted to stay here forever. She didn't feel so safe for a very long time. They were on the journey, chased by orcs, and she didn't feel in danger. All thanks to Thorin's presence.

 

" _Zi ghivashelê_ ," he muttered in her hair.

 

Beatrice raised her head, her nose rubbed against the dwarrow's beard. She sat on Thorin more cozy, so that he didn't have to hold her so tightly. Although Beatrice wrapped her arms around his neck and was far from harm, she wouldn't fall, he still pressed her hard.

 

“What does it mean?” she asked. “This and your words before the kiss?”

 

"It is very difficult to translate it into a common language," he whispered. “You will know, when you will start learning our language.”

 

“Isn't it one of the things that you keep in secret?” she laughed.

 

"As a future queen you should know the language of the people you will rule. I will talk to Balin about your lessons. You will start immediately.”

 

The smile slowly disappeared from her face. She was very happy, because everything was fine, there was no blood between them. She wanted to enjoy their strange form of betrothal, but his words caused her a great deal of stress. She completely forgot that Thorin was king, and that they were reclaiming his kingdom. If they succeed, Thorin will rule Erebor. Engagement leads to marriage, and when she marry the king, she becomes a queen.

 

Beatrice was weak at the thought of having such an important function.

 

"I'm not ready for it," she said.“I cannot... I do not know... I do not have the proper qualifications...”

 

"Beatrice," he muttered. He took her hand and forced her to look at her. “Just be yourself. You are a smart and capable woman. You can solve problems, people trust you, they love you. You have exceptional self-confidence and power.”

 

"But I'm not a dwarrow," she murmured.

 

"No, you're not," he admitted. "But you are part of me.”

 

Beatrice pressed her lips to his cheek. If Thorin believes in her, she will believe too. She will trust his judgment and work hard to make him proud of her, so he doesn't have to be embarrassed by her.

 

“So what now? Will you take earrings I offered you in Bag End? What is the next step in dwarves courtship?”

 

"Because you offered these, you should give them to me. Then make a braid. Then we will be at the same stage. However, you didn't know about our traditions, so one of your earrings will satisfy me.”

 

Thorin smiled gently and Beatrice took a breath. The smiling dwarrow was stunningly beautiful. She could not help but touch his raised lips.

 

"Choose it then," she whispered. The dwarrow's eyes were on hers. His thumb made the route from her chin, through the cheek to ear. He took one of her earrings still without looking away. Beatrice pushed aside his hair to examine his ears. 'You have no pierced ears. Are you going to do that especially for me?”

 

"I'll ask Bifur to do it tomorrow morning.”

 

Beatrice jumped from his knees and went to stand behind him. She removed the eraser from her hair and placed it on her wrist. She combed the dwarrow's hair and gathered them back to start fondling them. She decided to make five braids at the scalp to join them into one big braid. She tied it with her eraser.

 

“And what now?” she asked, hugging him from behind.

 

“Under normal circumstances we could start preparing for the wedding. During this time we would have to create gifts we would give each other on our wedding night. Now we have time to enjoy our espousal.”

 

“Espousal?”she muttered seductively.”What does that include?”

 

"For we're connected for our whole lives, everything is allowed." He kissed her hand. “Let's go to sleep now. The lights in the house are gone.”

 

"Only if you let me share a blanket with you," she demanded sleepily.

 

It was only when Thorin reminded her about sleeping, she felt it was late. The dwarrow chuckled, and Beatrice accepted it as an agreement.”

 

{*}

 

 

“How do you say 'my name is Beatrice, at yours and your family service'?”

 

" _I_ _mnê_ _Beatrice, zai adshânzu ra barafzu_ ," she said confidently.

 

"And how do you say you're poorly speaking in khuzdul and ask if someone speaks in common language?" asked Balin.

 

Beatrice was learning their language for four days now. She could introduce herself, say hello and a few basic things. As soon as Thorin made their engagement official, her intense study began. She practiced sword fighting, learned history, etiquette and language. However, the focus was on the first and last issue. They will leave Beorn tomorrow and will move on. Their quiet time, no disturbed learning, will be interrupted.

 

" _Birashagammi, gulubmi nithal Khuzdul…?_ " The sentence was uncertain. She often wrongly pronounced the name of their language. A similar problem was with the common language name.” _Saglibi Asjârlagb?”_

 

“Try to control your accent. You press too strongly on 'r'.”

 

Beatrice repeated these sentences from the beginning, trying to say it correctly. She finished when it was time to go to exercise, and when she returned, Balin told her the story of Durin. Today she was allowed to finish earlier. Everyone had to be rested before heading out.

 

"So we can officially call you auntie," Kili grinned.

 

“Are you happy, auntie Beatrice?” Fili joked.

 

"No, you little devils," She stuck her tongue out. “I will tell on you to your mother. I will ask for advise in revenge.”

 

"Auntie Beatrice," they moaned.

 

“You won't worm your way out of it. I'm going to sit with her, drinking tea and eating cookies and I'm going to complain about the men of her family.”

 

“What did I do wrong?” Thorin asked, sitting down beside her.

 

"You did not appear in my life earlier," she said, kissing his nose.

 

 

_**I give you all of me  
And you give me all of you, all *** _

 

_*** John Legend – All of me** _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> comment and leave kudos


	16. Walk on water

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> elves capture the company. beatrice is not amused

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> here i am with the new chapter, i hope you will enjoy it

_**In the end, the choice was clear  
Take a shot in the face of fear ** _

 

 

 

Beorn lent them his ponies, so they could reach the forest boundary quickly and safely.

 

Beatrice was riding with Dori, though Thorin had offered to ride together. She refused, because if something happened, the dwarrow would be very focused on her, and not on the fight. Dori believed in her skills. In the end, he trained with her. And she wanted their relationship to develop at pace, slowly. She did not want to accelerate their relationship unnecessarily.

 

"Set the ponies loose. Let them return to their master," said Gandalf, looking far away.

 

Beatrice followed his gaze and saw the dark shape. It was Beorn. She waved his bearded form, wondering if he was not there, the wizard would still told them to give the ponies back. She took her backpack from the back of the animal and put it on her own.

 

"This forest feels... sick, as if a disease lies upon it. Is there no way around? "asked Bilbo hoping they would be able to bypass the forest.

 

"Not unless we go two miles north, or twice that distance south."

 

Beatrice looked at the wizard wizard, that was gong somewhere and recalled that he will be back only after Erebor is reclaimed. Through the forest full of hostile elves they will have to go alone. Bilbo was surprised that Gandalf did not go with them. He saw in him a great consolation and a guardian. Beatrice knew, that things would have been different if the wizard was present as a mediator. Bilbo said he found something, when he was in the goblins town and the woman listened carefully. When Gandalf's body bent in half to lean over him, the hobbit stiffened. He lied to the wizard and it took Beatrice a moment to understand why. He was in possession of the ring.

 

"I'll be waiting for you at the overlook, before the slopes of Erebor. Keep map and key safe. Do not enter that mountain without me," Gandalf paused at the last sentence and looked eloquently at the leader of the group. Beatrice laughed. "This is not the Greenwood of old. The very air of the forest is heavy with illusion. It will seek to enter your mind and lead you astray. "

 

Gandalf mounted his horse. The sun was shining, there was no cloud in the sky, and yet the woman felt a few drops on her cheek. It was raining slightly. Wizard had to do something spectacular at the very end, of course. Why did it surprise her?

 

"You must stay on the path; do not leave it. If you do, you will never find it again." he shouted as he drove away.

 

"We're screwed," she said, walking into the forest.

 

 

{*}

 

The landscape continued to change, during the wander.

 

The colors remained the same. Dark, gray, depressing. They followed the path, and when Thorin couldn't find it, Dwalin or Balin helped him. Beatrice felt nauseous, air couldn't find a way to her lungs, others had similar difficulties. She couldn't focus, so she bumped into Nori, and the others on her. She touched her aching nose, which hit Nori's back.

 

"The path... it's disappeared!"

 

Beatrice peered over the dwarrow's shoulder to see, if the path really wasn't there. There was no doubt, they couldn't go any further. Dwalin appeared next to them to investigate the matter, and then began searching for the path. Finding it should not be difficult, speaking purely theoretically.

 

"What hour is it?"asked Thorin, looking around.

 

"I do not know. I do not even know what day it is," replied Dwalin, leading them deeper into the forest.

 

"Is there no end to this accursed place?"

 

The voices began to merge. Beatrice lost contact with the world around her. She blinked several times, wishing to regain her visibility. She took a deep breath and when she opened her eyes, she saw her mother in front of her. She stepped back, shocked.

 

“Mom? Is that you?” she asked, reaching for her hand.

 

"You weren't with me," she said, her voice nightmarish. “You gave up on me.”

 

"No, mommy, that's not it," she whispered, approaching her. “I didn't want it to happen...”

 

She stepped back as if something had burned her. Blood trickled from her mother's body. It flown from her eyes, from her nose, from her mouth. Beatrice saw only the red waterfall. She covered her mouth with a hand, so that sob couldn't came from her. The woman's body began to melt, until it created a puddle on the ground. Beatrice kept backing away, until she hit something behind her. She turned quickly.

 

She screamed. John stood before her. His handsome face was deformed. He grabbed her by the shoulders, then leaned over her. Beatrice looked around, terrified. She was looking for help, but none of the dwarves were there. She wanted to break free of the man's grip, but he clenched his fingers tighter. She squealed in pain.

 

“It hurts, John. Let me go.”

 

"No," he said, and a red liquid came out of his mouth. "What you do is hurting me. You promised me you would be mine. We were going to get married, be happy. And you destroy it. Why are you doing it, Beatrice? Why didn't you come back? Why did you betray me?!”

 

“John, please... I still love you, I've always loved you, just not like I love Thorin...”

 

John began to scream, his whole body trembling. Beatrice turned her head and closed her eyes, so she didn't have to look at it. When she opened it again, she stood on the path alone. A few seconds later, she was absorbed in darkness.

 

{*}

 

When she regained consciousness, she saw that she hung upside down. A sticky substance surrounded her, and when Beatrice looked around, she understood that she was in something like a cocoon. She began to wiggle, trying to get out. She stopped moving, when she heard a mysterious sound. Her heart beat faster. Something flashed past her and after a moment Beatrice realized she was on the spider's web. She groaned in thought, terrified and resigned. She calmed down, knowing that they must reach the mountain, so they would be saved. She stared wide-eyed into the darkness.

 

After a few minutes her world began to whirl, she felt she was falling. She hit the ground with a thud. She could bet, she would have a huge bruise after that. It made no difference to her. She was all in bruises, small wounds and scars. She ripped the cocoon and came out of it.

 

There were yells, and then the spiders surrounded them. Beatrice took out the sword she cut off two legs one of them to make it easier for Nori to kill him. They started running. They scrambled through the forest for a few minutes, until more spiders appeared. They stopped escaping to start the fight. They did not make it because there was a group of elves, who had finished the huge insects. Thorin pulled her to him after the threat of the blonde elf she recognized.

 

She grinned under her breath. Orlando Bloom's face was twisted in the grimace of disgust. He turned to look at her. He put away the arrow, the bow held loose. He knelt in front of her, studied her closely. Thorin wanted to stand in front of her, but Beatrice would not let him. She stared straight at the elf. He reached out and touched her cheek, but she stepped back, knowing that the leader of the company would not like it.

 

"I never thought these stories were real," he whispered.”thought it was just a story.”

 

Beatrice raised her eyebrows up. Orlando looked long and hard on the hand, that was embracing her. He caught her in his arms and stood up. She was dazed and she did not to react in any way.

 

"Do _not_ touch that pure creature with your filthy hands, _dwarf_ ," he growled and gave orders to the rest of the elves. “Search them.”

 

He also searched Gloin with one hand. Beatrice blinked a few times, just now coming out of shock. Orlando Bloom has found pictures of the dwarrow's family. Beatrice almost warned the elf not to even mention them, because Gloin was able to talk about them all the time, but she doubted the dwarrow would want to kiss and tell with the elf.

 

"Hey! Give it back! That's private!"

 

"Who is this? Your brother? "he asked.

 

"That is my wife!" shouted the indignant Gloin. Beatrice looked at him pleadingly, not wanting to bring trouble to them. The dwarrow ignored her. She groaned.

 

"And what is this horrid creature?" Beatrice pulled the elf by the hair and showed him her displeased face, and he seemed more amused by it."A goblin mutant?"

 

"That's my wee lad, Gimli."

 

Beatrice watched the Lord of the Rings as a child, but she remembered that the archer was traveling with Gimli. In addition, her best friend shipped them. She was so done by this situation.

 

They took their weapons, accused Thorin of being a liar and a thief, and then they moved.

 

Beatrice was still kept by the elf, and she was not going to get away with it. Her legs hurt from wandering through the forest and being held up was not so bad. She leaned against him more, letting her muscles rest.

 

"Hold on a little longer, aiwe," he said to her. “We're almost there.”

 

Beatrice quivered, when she heard that word, still unknown to her. The elf in Rivendell called her the same. She looked behind them to make sure the dwarves did not hear her. She did not want them to be angry at her for talking to the race they hated.

 

“What does it mean?” she asked quietly. “Aive?”

 

“Aiwe,” he corrected her, then looked at her surprised. “You do not know who you are?”

 

“If I knew, I would not ask,”she muttered. "The Elves of Rivendell did not behave like that with me. And you still did not tell me what it means.”

 

"That means 'little bird'," he said finally. "Your race, Randir, were wanderers. I'll explain everything after you rest. You look very tired.”

 

"No, no, no," She leaned back to look at his face. “You will tell me now, because I do not understand anything. What do you mean by saying 'your race'? You call Men wanderers? Are they not living here sedentary?

 

"Not Men, but your kind, aiwe," laughed Bloom, apparently amused by her lack of knowledge. “And yes, Men lead a settled lifestyle. I'm guessing you have a lot to ask, but we will have time later.”

 

Beatrice didn't ask for anything more, and in silence she watched the dark forest. The girl felt the bad vibrations from it, that made her shiver. They entered the bridge. Beatrice admired the huge building. It looked different. Less idyllic, but still beautiful. It could have been assumed that if it were not for a disease attacking the forest, the landscape would have been much more lovely than Rivendell.

 

They went down the stairs. Beatrice looked fascinated by architecture. She started to wriggle only when she saw that they were in the dungeons. When they pushed the first dwarrow into the cell, she began to protest. Verbally and nonverbally. She kicked the elf harder and shouted louder and louder. It didn't work. Orlando grabbed her with his other hand so she would not break free. They began to climb the stairs.

 

'Where do you take her, elf?!” Thorin shouted. “Beatrice! Beatrice?!'

 

“Thorin! Thorin!”

 

She reached out her hand and hoped that she could somehow touch her beloved. However, she failed, they were already upstairs. The female elf joined them and started talking. They talked about something in their language, but now the blond seemed to be less disgusted, and the elf maiden more composed. She was exhausted after constantly resisting, so she only pulled him by the hair with a chin resting on his shoulder. She looked like a child, that the older brother had to get out of the store, because she made a ruckus, when she did not get her favorite snack or a new toy.

 

“Legolas must really like you, little one, for he lets you do such things with his hair,“ The elf informed her.

 

Beatrice looked at her and her hands moved to the Legolas's cheeks. She began to massage them painfully. The elf sighed, his face impatient and angry with her childish behavior. She raised her eyebrows up.

 

"It's passive-aggressive behavior," she deadpanned.”I do not want you to speak to me. You captured my family and threw them into dungeons. You take me God know where to do God know what. I do not like you at all.”

 

They laughed loudly.

 

“Do you consider these slobs for your family?”

 

"I would advise you to watch your words, mister," she said, straightening in his embrace. "I can be small, but that does not mean I'm weak. I do not want you talking about my friends like that.”

 

They didn't speak to her on the entire route to the mysterious room. Legolas opened it and then placed her on the ground. It was a bedroom. There was a huge bed with blue linen, a large wardrobe, a table and two chairs. It was minimalist, but classy. There were no windows, but Beatrice saw the door that she thought would lead her to a primitive bathroom.

 

"Someone will bring you warm water to bathe and clean clothes. Later someone will come to pick you up for dinner with the king-”

 

“I don't want to,” she said. "I don't want such luxuries, take me back to the dwarves.”

 

"I'm sorry, aiwe, but I cannot do so," Legolas said.”In a short time someone will come to you, be patient.”

 

He left with the female and locked the door. Beatrice cried out frustrated. She did _not_ know what to do. She did _not_ know what was happening. She did _not_ know what they were going to do to her and her friends. How to behave? What to say? Do the dwarves already have a plan?

 

Beatrice threw herself on the bed without worrying about being dirty. She dropped on the soft pillows and collapsed into them as if they were a cloud. Seconds later, she fell asleep.

 

 

 

 

_**Do you believe that you can walk on water?  
D you believe that you can win this fight tonight? *** _

 

_*** 30 Seconds To Mars – Walk On Water** _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> love me love me say that you love me~ or not me but story. comment and leave kudos :D


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